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Size: 100Est cost: $1030.96
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Huge Lesbian Girlfriend
Huge Lesbian Girlfriend
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"I Can Chump That It's Literally a Vanilla Creature"
Sword of Hearth and Home
Equipped creature gets +2/+2 and has protection from green and from white.
Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, exile up to one target creature you own, then search your library for a basic land card. Put both cards onto the battlefield under your control, then shuffle.
Equip
Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, exile up to one target creature you own, then search your library for a basic land card. Put both cards onto the battlefield under your control, then shuffle.
Equip
Artifact - Equipment

"I Can Chump That It's Literally a Vanilla Creature"
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Casually Throwing Half My Deck Into the Trash
Cemetery Tampering
Hideaway 5 (When this enchantment enters, look at the top five cards of your library, exile one face down, then put the rest on the bottom in a random order.)
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may mill three cards. Then if there are twenty or more cards in your graveyard, you may play the exiled card without paying its mana cost.
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may mill three cards. Then if there are twenty or more cards in your graveyard, you may play the exiled card without paying its mana cost.
Enchantment

Casually Throwing Half My Deck Into the Trash
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Evil and Intimidating Lesbian GF
Evil and Intimidating Lesbian GF
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I Don't Like That Very Much
I Don't Like That Very Much
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I Paid 8 Mana For That So I Deserve To Draw 8 Cards
I Paid 8 Mana For That So I Deserve To Draw 8 Cards
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I Win The Game O'Tron
Bolas's Citadel
You may look at the top card of your library any time.
You may play lands and cast spells from the top of your library. If you cast a spell this way, pay life equal to its mana value rather than pay its mana cost.
, Sacrifice ten nonland permanents: Each opponent loses 10 life.
You may play lands and cast spells from the top of your library. If you cast a spell this way, pay life equal to its mana value rather than pay its mana cost.
, Sacrifice ten nonland permanents: Each opponent loses 10 life.
Legendary Artifact

I Win The Game O'Tron
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Just Taking Out a Small Loan (DON'T SPEND THE TREASURES FOR MANA)
Ruthless Technomancer
When this creature enters, you may sacrifice another creature you control. If you do, create a number of Treasure tokens equal to that creature's power.
, Sacrifice X artifacts: Return target creature card with power X or less from your graveyard to the battlefield. X can't be 0.
, Sacrifice X artifacts: Return target creature card with power X or less from your graveyard to the battlefield. X can't be 0.
Creature - Human Wizard

Just Taking Out a Small Loan (DON'T SPEND THE TREASURES FOR MANA)
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Legally Mandated Dose of Variance
Susur Secundi, Void Altar
This land enters tapped.
: Add .
Station (Tap another creature you control: Put charge counters equal to its power on this Planet. Station only as a sorcery.)
12+ | , , Pay 2 life, Sacrifice a creature: Draw cards equal to the sacrificed creature's power. Activate only as a sorcery.
: Add .
Station (Tap another creature you control: Put charge counters equal to its power on this Planet. Station only as a sorcery.)
12+ | , , Pay 2 life, Sacrifice a creature: Draw cards equal to the sacrificed creature's power. Activate only as a sorcery.
Land - Planet

Legally Mandated Dose of Variance
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Lesbian Adderall
Lesbian Adderall
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Life Is Just a Resource
Whip of Erebos
Creatures you control have lifelink.
, : Return target creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield. It gains haste. Exile it at the beginning of the next end step. If it would leave the battlefield, exile it instead of putting it anywhere else. Activate only as a sorcery.
, : Return target creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield. It gains haste. Exile it at the beginning of the next end step. If it would leave the battlefield, exile it instead of putting it anywhere else. Activate only as a sorcery.
Legendary Artifact Enchantment

Life Is Just a Resource
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Of Course I Paid Full Mana Price Officer
Animate Dead
Enchant creature card in a graveyard
When this Aura enters, if it's on the battlefield, it loses "enchant creature card in a graveyard" and gains "enchant creature put onto the battlefield with this Aura." Return enchanted creature card to the battlefield under your control and attach this Aura to it. When this Aura leaves the battlefield, that creature's controller sacrifices it.
Enchanted creature gets -1/-0.
When this Aura enters, if it's on the battlefield, it loses "enchant creature card in a graveyard" and gains "enchant creature put onto the battlefield with this Aura." Return enchanted creature card to the battlefield under your control and attach this Aura to it. When this Aura leaves the battlefield, that creature's controller sacrifices it.
Enchanted creature gets -1/-0.
Enchantment - Aura

Mikaeus, the Unhallowed
Intimidate (This creature can't be blocked except by artifact creatures and/or creatures that share a color with it.)
Whenever a Human deals damage to you, destroy it.
Other non-Human creatures you control get +1/+1 and have undying. (When a creature with undying dies, if it had no +1/+1 counters on it, return it to the battlefield under its owner's control with a +1/+1 counter on it.)
Whenever a Human deals damage to you, destroy it.
Other non-Human creatures you control get +1/+1 and have undying. (When a creature with undying dies, if it had no +1/+1 counters on it, return it to the battlefield under its owner's control with a +1/+1 counter on it.)
Legendary Creature - Cleric Zombie

Of Course I Paid Full Mana Price Officer
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Please Please PLEASE GIVE ME SOMETHING GOOD
Please Please PLEASE GIVE ME SOMETHING GOOD
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Spooky Scary Skeleton Dance
Corpses of the Lost
Skeletons you control get +1/+0 and have haste.
When this enchantment enters, create a 2/2 black Skeleton Pirate creature token.
At the beginning of your end step, if you descended this turn, you may pay 1 life. If you do, return this enchantment to its owner's hand. (You descended if a permanent card was put into your graveyard from anywhere.)
When this enchantment enters, create a 2/2 black Skeleton Pirate creature token.
At the beginning of your end step, if you descended this turn, you may pay 1 life. If you do, return this enchantment to its owner's hand. (You descended if a permanent card was put into your graveyard from anywhere.)
Enchantment

Spooky Scary Skeleton Dance
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The Stompers
Emrakul, the Promised End
This spell costs less to cast for each card type among cards in your graveyard.
When you cast this spell, you gain control of target opponent during that player's next turn. After that turn, that player takes an extra turn.
Flying, trample, protection from instants
When you cast this spell, you gain control of target opponent during that player's next turn. After that turn, that player takes an extra turn.
Flying, trample, protection from instants
Legendary Creature - Eldrazi

Overlord of the Balemurk
Impending 5— (If you cast this spell for its impending cost, it enters with five time counters and isn't a creature until the last is removed. At the beginning of your end step, remove a time counter from it.)
Whenever this permanent enters or attacks, mill four cards, then you may return a non-Avatar creature card or a planeswalker card from your graveyard to your hand.
Whenever this permanent enters or attacks, mill four cards, then you may return a non-Avatar creature card or a planeswalker card from your graveyard to your hand.
Creature Enchantment - Avatar Horror

Valgavoth, Terror Eater
Flying, lifelink
Ward—Sacrifice three nonland permanents.
If a card you didn't control would be put into an opponent's graveyard from anywhere, exile it instead.
During your turn, you may play cards exiled with Valgavoth. If you cast a spell this way, pay life equal to its mana value rather than pay its mana cost.
Ward—Sacrifice three nonland permanents.
If a card you didn't control would be put into an opponent's graveyard from anywhere, exile it instead.
During your turn, you may play cards exiled with Valgavoth. If you cast a spell this way, pay life equal to its mana value rather than pay its mana cost.
Legendary Creature - Elder Demon

The Stompers
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Totally 100% Not Ramp Trust Me On This One
The Darkness Crystal
Black spells you cast cost less to cast.
If a nontoken creature an opponent controls would die, instead exile it and you gain 2 life.
, : Put target creature card exiled with The Darkness Crystal onto the battlefield tapped under your control with two additional +1/+1 counters on it.
If a nontoken creature an opponent controls would die, instead exile it and you gain 2 life.
, : Put target creature card exiled with The Darkness Crystal onto the battlefield tapped under your control with two additional +1/+1 counters on it.
Legendary Artifact

Totally 100% Not Ramp Trust Me On This One
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Maybeboard
Not Dead After All
Until end of turn, target creature you control gains "When this creature dies, return it to the battlefield tapped under its owner's control, then create a Wicked Role token attached to it." (Enchanted creature gets +1/+1. When this token is put into a graveyard, each opponent loses 1 life.)
Instant

Syr Konrad, the Grim
Whenever another creature dies, or a creature card is put into a graveyard from anywhere other than the battlefield, or a creature card leaves your graveyard, Syr Konrad deals 1 damage to each opponent.
: Each player mills a card. (They each put the top card of their library into their graveyard.)
: Each player mills a card. (They each put the top card of their library into their graveyard.)
Legendary Creature - Human Knight

Maybeboard
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