Guff Rewrites History

For each player, choose target nonenchantment, nonland permanent that player controls. Those permanents' owners shuffle them into their libraries. Each player who controlled one of those permanents exiles cards from the top of their library until they exile a nonland card, then puts the rest on the bottom of their library in a random order. Each player may cast the nonland card they exiled without paying its mana cost.

Court of Ambition

When this enchantment enters, you become the monarch.
At the beginning of your upkeep, each opponent loses 3 life unless they discard a card. If you're the monarch, instead each opponent loses 6 life unless they discard two cards.

Ring of Xathrid

{2}: Regenerate equipped creature. (The next time that creature would be destroyed this turn, instead tap it, remove it from combat, and heal all damage on it.)
At the beginning of your upkeep, put a +1/+1 counter on equipped creature if it's black.
Equip {1} ({1}: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.)

Key to the City

{T}, Discard a card: Up to one target creature can't be blocked this turn.
Whenever this artifact becomes untapped, you may pay {2}. If you do, draw a card.

Court of Ire

When this enchantment enters, you become the monarch.
At the beginning of your upkeep, this enchantment deals 2 damage to any target. If you're the monarch, it deals 7 damage instead.

Prowler's Helm

Equipped creature can't be blocked except by Walls.
Equip {2}

Winged Boots

Equipped creature has flying and ward {4}. (Whenever equipped creature becomes the target of a spell or ability an opponent controls, counter it unless that player pays {4}.)
Equip {1}

Izzet Signet

Talisman of Indulgence

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {B} or {R}. This artifact deals 1 damage to you.

Vorpal Sword

Equipped creature gets +2/+0 and has deathtouch.
{5}{B}{B}{B}: Until end of turn, this Equipment gains "Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, that player loses the game."
Equip {B}{B}

Ring of Valkas

Equipped creature has haste. (It can attack and {T} no matter when it came under your control.)
At the beginning of your upkeep, put a +1/+1 counter on equipped creature if it's red.
Equip {1} ({1}: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.)

Temple of Malice

This land enters tapped.
When this land enters, scry 1. (Look at the top card of your library. You may put that card on the bottom.)
{T}: Add {B} or {R}.

Proft's Eidetic Memory

When Proft's Eidetic Memory enters, draw a card.
You have no maximum hand size.
At the beginning of combat on your turn, if you've drawn more than one card this turn, put X +1/+1 counters on target creature you control, where X is the number of cards you've drawn this turn minus one.

Rogue's Passage

{T}: Add {C}.
{4}, {T}: Target creature can't be blocked this turn.

The Trickster-God's Heist

(As this Saga enters and after your draw step, add a lore counter. Sacrifice after III.)
I — You may exchange control of two target creatures.
II — You may exchange control of two target nonbasic, noncreature permanents that share a card type.
III — Target player loses 3 life and you gain 3 life.

Exotic Orchard

{T}: Add one mana of any color that a land an opponent controls could produce.

Rakdos Signet

Exalted Flamer of Tzeentch

Sorcerous Inspiration — At the beginning of your upkeep, return an instant or sorcery card at random from your graveyard to your hand.
Fire of Tzeentch — Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, this creature deals 1 damage to each opponent.

Talisman of Creativity

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {U} or {R}. This artifact deals 1 damage to you.

Obeka, Splitter of Seconds

Menace
Whenever Obeka deals combat damage to a player, you get that many additional upkeep steps after this phase.

Feed the Swarm

Destroy target creature or enchantment an opponent controls. You lose life equal to that permanent's mana value.

Resculpt

Exile target artifact or creature. Its controller creates a 4/4 blue and red Elemental creature token.

Wash Out

Return all permanents of the color of your choice to their owners' hands.

Propaganda

Creatures can't attack you unless their controller pays {2} for each creature they control that's attacking you.

Robe of the Archmagi

Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, you draw that many cards.
Equip {4}
Equip Shaman, Warlock, or Wizard {1}

Vorrac Battlehorns

Equipped creature has trample and can't be blocked by more than one creature.
Equip {1} ({1}: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.)

Honden of Seeing Winds

At the beginning of your upkeep, draw a card for each Shrine you control.

Blackblade Reforged

Equipped creature gets +1/+1 for each land you control.
Equip legendary creature {3}
Equip {7}

Feast on the Fallen

At the beginning of each upkeep, if an opponent lost life last turn, put a +1/+1 counter on target creature you control.

Reality Shift

Exile target creature. Its controller manifests the top card of their library. (That player puts the top card of their library onto the battlefield face down as a 2/2 creature. If it's a creature card, it can be turned face up any time for its mana cost.)

Honden of Infinite Rage

At the beginning of your upkeep, Honden of Infinite Rage deals damage to any target equal to the number of Shrines you control.

Nightscape Familiar

Blue spells and red spells you cast cost {1} less to cast.
{1}{B}: Regenerate this creature.

Creeping Dread

At the beginning of your upkeep, each player discards a card. Each opponent who discarded a card that shares a card type with the card you discarded loses 3 life. (Players reveal the discarded cards simultaneously.)

Sweeping Cleave

Target creature you control gains double strike until end of turn. (Then exile this card. You may cast the artifact later from exile.)

Two-Handed Axe

Whenever equipped creature attacks, double its power until end of turn.
Equip {1}{R}

Two-Handed Axe // Sweeping Cleave

Protection Racket

At the beginning of your upkeep, repeat the following process for each opponent in turn order. Reveal the top card of your library. That player may pay life equal to that card's mana value. If they do, exile that card. Otherwise, put it into your hand.

Walking Atlas

{T}: You may put a land card from your hand onto the battlefield.

Trailblazer's Boots

Equipped creature has nonbasic landwalk. (It can't be blocked as long as defending player controls a nonbasic land.)
Equip {2}

Security Bypass

Enchant creature
As long as enchanted creature is attacking alone, it can't be blocked.
Enchanted creature has "Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, it connives." (Its controller draws a card, then discards a card. If they discarded a nonland card, they put a +1/+1 counter on this creature.)

Stormfist Crusader

Menace
At the beginning of your upkeep, each player draws a card and loses 1 life.

Swamp

Venser's Journal

You have no maximum hand size.
At the beginning of your upkeep, you gain 1 life for each card in your hand.

Paradox Haze

Enchant player
At the beginning of enchanted player's first upkeep each turn, that player gets an additional upkeep step after this step.

Wild Evocation

At the beginning of each player's upkeep, that player reveals a card at random from their hand. If it's a land card, the player puts it onto the battlefield. Otherwise, the player casts it without paying its mana cost if able.

Plargg and Nassari

At the beginning of your upkeep, each player exiles cards from the top of their library until they exile a nonland card. An opponent chooses a nonland card exiled this way. You may cast up to two spells from among the other cards exiled this way without paying their mana costs.

Lizard Blades

Double strike
Equipped creature has double strike.
Reconfigure {2} ({2}: Attach to target creature you control; or unattach from a creature. Reconfigure only as a sorcery. While attached, this isn't a creature.)

Aqueous Form

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature can't be blocked.
Whenever enchanted creature attacks, scry 1. (Look at the top card of your library. You may put that card on the bottom.)

Ring of Evos Isle

{2}: Equipped creature gains hexproof until end of turn. (It can't be the target of spells or abilities your opponents control.)
At the beginning of your upkeep, put a +1/+1 counter on equipped creature if it's blue.
Equip {1} ({1}: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.)

Make an Example

Each opponent separates the creatures they control into two piles. For each opponent, you choose one of their piles. Each opponent sacrifices the creatures in their chosen pile. (Piles can be empty.)

Mountain

Laughing Jasper Flint

Creatures you control but don't own are Mercenaries in addition to their other types.
At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top X cards of target opponent's library, where X is the number of outlaws you control. Until end of turn, you may cast spells from among those cards, and mana of any type can be spent to cast those spells.

Curse of the Swine

Exile X target creatures. For each creature exiled this way, its controller creates a 2/2 green Boar creature token.

Sulfur Falls

This land enters tapped unless you control an Island or a Mountain.
{T}: Add {U} or {R}.

The Ruinous Powers

At the beginning of your upkeep, choose an opponent at random. Exile the top card of that player's library. Until end of turn, you may play that card and you may spend mana as though it were mana of any color to cast it. When you cast a spell this way, its owner loses life equal to its mana value.

Sulfurous Springs

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {B} or {R}. This land deals 1 damage to you.

Crumbling Necropolis

This land enters tapped.
{T}: Add {U}, {B}, or {R}.

Cunning Lethemancer

At the beginning of your upkeep, each player discards a card.

Glen Elendra Archmage

Flying
{U}, Sacrifice this creature: Counter target noncreature spell.
Persist (When this creature dies, if it had no -1/-1 counters on it, return it to the battlefield under its owner's control with a -1/-1 counter on it.)

Dimir Signet

As Foretold

At the beginning of your upkeep, put a time counter on this enchantment.
Once each turn, you may pay {0} rather than pay the mana cost for a spell you cast with mana value X or less, where X is the number of time counters on this enchantment.

Court of Vantress

When this enchantment enters, you become the monarch.
At the beginning of your upkeep, choose up to one other target enchantment or artifact. If you're the monarch, you may create a token that's a copy of it. If you're not the monarch, you may have this enchantment become a copy of it, except it has this ability.

Whispersilk Cloak

Equipped creature can't be blocked and has shroud. (It can't be the target of spells or abilities.)
Equip {2}

Sanctum of Stone Fangs

At the beginning of your first main phase, each opponent loses X life and you gain X life, where X is the number of Shrines you control.

Keen Duelist

At the beginning of your upkeep, you and target opponent each reveal the top card of your library. You each lose life equal to the mana value of the card revealed by the other player. You each put the card you revealed into your hand.

Blasphemous Act

This spell costs {1} less to cast for each creature on the battlefield.
Blasphemous Act deals 13 damage to each creature.

An Offer You Can't Refuse

Counter target noncreature spell. Its controller creates two Treasure tokens. (They're artifacts with "{T}, Sacrifice this token: Add one mana of any color.")

Honden of Night's Reach

At the beginning of your upkeep, target opponent discards a card for each Shrine you control.

Frostboil Snarl

As this land enters, you may reveal an Island or Mountain card from your hand. If you don't, this land enters tapped.
{T}: Add {U} or {R}.

Sunken Hollow

({T}: Add {U} or {B}.)
This land enters tapped unless you control two or more basic lands.

Sword Coast Sailor

Commander creatures you own have "Whenever this creature attacks a player, if no opponent has more life than that player, this creature can't be blocked this turn."

Phyrexian Reclamation

{1}{B}, Pay 2 life: Return target creature card from your graveyard to your hand.

Descent into Avernus

At the beginning of your upkeep, put two descent counters on this enchantment. Then each player creates X Treasure tokens and this enchantment deals X damage to each player, where X is the number of descent counters on this enchantment.

Creeping Bloodsucker

At the beginning of your upkeep, this creature deals 1 damage to each opponent. You gain life equal to the damage dealt this way.

Talisman of Dominance

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {U} or {B}. This artifact deals 1 damage to you.

Arcane Signet

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Command Tower

Dragonmaster Outcast

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you control six or more lands, create a 5/5 red Dragon creature token with flying.

Go-Shintai of Lost Wisdom

Flying
At the beginning of your end step, you may pay {1}. When you do, target player mills X cards, where X is the number of Shrines you control. (To mill a card, a player puts the top card of their library into their graveyard.)

Temple of Deceit

This land enters tapped.
When this land enters, scry 1. (Look at the top card of your library. You may put that card on the bottom.)
{T}: Add {U} or {B}.

Go-Shintai of Hidden Cruelty

Deathtouch
At the beginning of your end step, you may pay {1}. When you do, destroy target creature with toughness X or less, where X is the number of Shrines you control.

Braid of Fire

Cumulative upkeep—Add {R}. (At the beginning of your upkeep, put an age counter on this permanent, then sacrifice it unless you pay its upkeep cost for each age counter on it.)

Sin Prodder

Menace
At the beginning of your upkeep, reveal the top card of your library. Any opponent may have you put that card into your graveyard. If a player does, this creature deals damage to that player equal to that card's mana value. Otherwise, put that card into your hand.

Esior, Wardwing Familiar

Flying
Spells your opponents cast that target one or more commanders you control cost {3} more to cast.
Partner (You can have two commanders if both have partner.)

Shivan Reef

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {U} or {R}. This land deals 1 damage to you.

Island

Inspiring Refrain

Draw two cards. Exile Inspiring Refrain with three time counters on it.
Suspend 3—{2}{U} (Rather than cast this card from your hand, you may pay {2}{U} and exile it with three time counters on it. At the beginning of your upkeep, remove a time counter. When the last is removed, you may cast it without paying its mana cost.)

Court of Embereth

When this enchantment enters, you become the monarch.
At the beginning of your upkeep, create a 3/1 red Knight creature token. Then if you're the monarch, this enchantment deals X damage to each opponent, where X is the number of creatures you control.

Cloud Key

As this artifact enters, choose artifact, creature, enchantment, instant, or sorcery.
Spells you cast of the chosen type cost {1} less to cast.

Go-Shintai of Ancient Wars

First strike
At the beginning of your end step, you may pay {1}. When you do, Go-Shintai of Ancient Wars deals X damage to target player or planeswalker, where X is the number of Shrines you control.

Swiftfoot Boots

Equipped creature has hexproof and haste. (It can't be the target of spells or abilities your opponents control. It can attack and {T} no matter when it came under your control.)
Equip {1} ({1}: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.)

Extravagant Replication

At the beginning of your upkeep, create a token that's a copy of another target nonland permanent you control.

Herald of Leshrac

Flying
Cumulative upkeep—Gain control of a land you don't control. (At the beginning of your upkeep, put an age counter on this permanent, then sacrifice it unless you pay its upkeep cost for each age counter on it.)
This creature gets +1/+1 for each land you control but don't own.
When this creature leaves the battlefield, each player gains control of each land they own that you control.

Temple of Epiphany

This land enters tapped.
When this land enters, scry 1. (Look at the top card of your library. You may put that card on the bottom.)
{T}: Add {U} or {R}.

Sanctum of Shattered Heights

{1}, Discard a land card or Shrine card: Sanctum of Shattered Heights deals X damage to target creature or planeswalker, where X is the number of Shrines you control.

Rousing Refrain

Add {R} for each card in target opponent's hand. Until end of turn, you don't lose this mana as steps and phases end. Exile Rousing Refrain with three time counters on it.
Suspend 3—{1}{R} (Rather than cast this card from your hand, you may pay {1}{R} and exile it with three time counters on it. At the beginning of your upkeep, remove a time counter. When the last is removed, you may cast it without paying its mana cost.)

Sanctum of Calm Waters

At the beginning of your first main phase, you may draw X cards, where X is the number of Shrines you control. If you do, discard a card.