Once More with Feeling

Exile all permanents and all cards from all graveyards. Each player shuffles their hand into their library, then draws seven cards. Each player's life total becomes 10. Exile Once More with Feeling.
DCI ruling — A deck can have only one card named Once More with Feeling.

Baron Von Count

Baron Von Count enters with a doom counter on "5."
Whenever you cast a spell with the indicated numeral in its mana cost, text box, power, or toughness, move the doom counter one numeral to the left.
When the doom counter moves from "1," destroy target player and put that doom counter on "5."

Man of Measure

As long as you're shorter than an opponent, Man of Measure gets +0/+1 and has first strike.
As long as you're taller than an opponent, Man of Measure gets +1/+0.

Mouth to Mouth

Choose target opponent and target creature they control. You and that player have a breath-holding contest. If you win, you gain control of that creature.

Buzzing Whack-a-Doodle

As this artifact enters, you and an opponent each secretly choose Whack or Doodle. Then those choices are revealed. If the choices match, this artifact has that ability. Otherwise, it has Buzz.
• Whack — {T}: Target player loses 2 life.
• Doodle — {T}: You gain 3 life.
• Buzz — {2}, {T}: Draw a card.

Border Guardian

Whenever you cast a silver-bordered spell, put a +1/+1 counter on this creature.
Whenever you cast a black-bordered spell, this creature can't be blocked this turn.
Whenever you cast a white-bordered spell, this creature gains double strike until end of turn.

Curse of the Fire Penguin Creature

Trample
When this creature dies, return Curse of the Fire Penguin to the battlefield.

Curse of the Fire Penguin

Enchant creature
This enchantment consumes and confuses enchanted creature.

Curse of the Fire Penguin // Curse of the Fire Penguin Creature

Tainted Isle

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {U} or {B}. Activate only if you control a Swamp.

Abstract Iguanart

Whenever you cast a spell, note the first letter of its artist's name. If that letter wasn't already noted, put a +1/+1 counter on this creature.

Keeper of the Sacred Word

As this creature enters, choose a word.
Whenever an opponent says the chosen word, this creature gets +3/+3 until end of turn.

Dimir Aqueduct

This land enters tapped.
When this land enters, return a land you control to its owner's hand.
{T}: Add {U}{B}.

Bojuka Bog

This land enters tapped.
When this land enters, exile target player's graveyard.
{T}: Add {B}.

Space Beleren

Space sculptor (Space Beleren divides the battlefield into alpha, beta, and gamma sectors. If a creature isn't assigned to a sector, its controller assigns it to one. Opponents assign first.)
+1: Creatures in each sector can be blocked this turn only by creatures in the same sector.
−1: Put a +1/+1 counter on each creature in the sector of your choice.
−5: Destroy all creatures in the sector of your choice.

Hazmat Suit (Used)

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +2/+1 and has menace.
Whenever a player's skin or fingernail touches enchanted creature, that player loses 2 life.

capital offense

target creature gets -x/-x until end of turn, where x is the number of times a capital letter appears in its rules text. (ignore reminder text and flavor text.)

Question Elemental?

Did you know this creature has flying?
Are you aware that any time you say something that isn't a question, when a player points out this fact first, they gain control of this creature?

Ambiguity

Whenever a player plays a spell that counters a spell that has been played or a player plays a spell that comes into play with counters, that player may counter the next spell played or put an additional counter on a permanent that has already been played, but not countered.

Last-Minute Chopping

Ask target opponent if they remembered to get you a present. If they say yes, they put a card they own from outside the game into your hand. Otherwise, you gain control of target permanent they control.

Farewell to Arms

As this enchantment enters, choose a hand attached to an opponent's arm.
When the chosen hand isn't behind its owner's back, sacrifice this enchantment. If you do, that player discards their hand . . . of cards. (The lawyers wouldn't let us do it the other way.)

Bursting Beebles

This creature can't be blocked as long as defending player controls two or more nonland permanents that share an artist.

Common Courtesy

Whenever a player casts a spell without asking your permission while casting it, counter that spell.
When a player asks you permission to cast a spell and you refuse, counter that spell and sacrifice this enchantment.

Sunken Hollow

({T}: Add {U} or {B}.)
This land enters tapped unless you control two or more basic lands.

Avatar of Me

This spell costs {1} more to cast for each ten years you've been alive.
Avatar of Me's power is equal to your height in feet and its toughness is equal to your American shoe size. Round to the nearest ½.
Avatar of Me is the color of your eyes.

First Come, First Served

Each attacking or blocking creature with the lowest collector number among attacking or blocking creatures has first strike.

B-I-N-G-O

Trample
Whenever a player casts a spell, put a chip counter on its mana value.
This creature gets +9/+9 for each set of three numbers in a row with chip counters on them.

Watery Grave

({T}: Add {U} or {B}.)
As this land enters, you may pay 2 life. If you don't, it enters tapped.

Exotic Orchard

{T}: Add one mana of any color that a land an opponent controls could produce.

Reliquary Tower

You have no maximum hand size.
{T}: Add {C}.

Cheatyface

If Cheatyface is in your hand, you may sneak Cheatyface onto the battlefield. If an opponent catches you right away, that player may exile Cheatyface.
Flying

Modular Monstrosity

Whenever an opponent casts a spell, you have five seconds to choose a keyword you haven't chosen for a card named Modular Monstrosity today that's been printed on a creature card. If you do, this creature gains that ability. Otherwise, this creature loses all keyword abilities.

Bloodletter

When the names of three or more nonland permanents begin with the same letter, sacrifice this creature. If you do, it deals 2 damage to each creature and each player.

Handy Dandy Clone Machine

{2}, {T}: Create a 2/2 colorless Homunculus creature token. It must be represented by a unique hand and two fingers at all times, or it ceases to exist.

Carnivorous Death-Parrot

Flying
At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice this creature unless you say its flavor text.

Deadhead

{0}: Return this card from your graveyard to the battlefield. Activate only if an opponent isn't touching their hand (of cards).

Charm School

As this enchantment enters, choose a color and balance this enchantment on your head.
Prevent all damage that would be dealt to you by sources of the chosen color.
When this enchantment falls off your head, sacrifice this enchantment.

Clam Session

As this creature enters, choose a word.
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may sing at least six words of a song, at least one of which is the chosen word. If you don't, sacrifice this creature. You can't repeat a song.

Animate Library

Enchant your library
Enchanted library is an artifact creature on the battlefield with power and toughness each equal to the number of cards in it. It's still a library.
If enchanted library would leave the battlefield, exile this Aura instead.

Over My Dead Bodies

Creature cards in graveyards can attack and block as though they were on the battlefield, can block or be blocked only by creature cards in graveyards, are Zombies in addition to their other types, and have undeathtouch. (If they would deal damage to a creature card, exile that creature card instead.)
Creature cards in your graveyard have haste.

Entirely Normal Armchair

During your turn, if this card is in your hand, you may hide it on the battlefield.
{0}: Return this artifact to its owner's hand. Only your opponents may activate this ability and only if they see this artifact.
{2}, Sacrifice this artifact: Destroy target attacking creature.

Bronze Calendar

Spells you cast cost {1} less to cast.
You must speak in a voice other than your normal voice.
When you speak in your normal voice, sacrifice this artifact.

Face to Face

You and target opponent play a best two-out-of-three Rock, Paper, Scissors match. If you win, Face to Face deals 5 damage to that player.

Boomstacker

As this creature enters and whenever it attacks, stack two dice on top of it. (All dice must be stacked vertically, one on top of another.)
This creature gets +1/+1 for each die in its stack.
This creature attacks each combat if able.
When the stack falls, sacrifice this creature.

Free-for-All

When this enchantment enters, exile all creatures face down.
At the beginning of each player's upkeep, that player chooses a card exiled with this enchantment at random and puts it onto the battlefield.
When this enchantment leaves the battlefield, put all cards exiled with it into their owners' graveyards.

Cramped Bunker

At the beginning of each opponent's upkeep, that player moves a permanent they control to touch this enchantment and no other permanents. If the player can't, destroy each permanent they control that isn't touching this enchantment, then sacrifice it.

Censorship

As this enchantment enters, choose a word.
Whenever a player says the chosen word, this enchantment deals 2 damage to that player.

Graveyard Busybody

All graveyards are also your graveyards.
Graveyard Busybody's power and toughness are each equal to the number of cards with flavor text in your graveyards.

Underground River

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {U} or {B}. This land deals 1 damage to you.

Land Aid '04

Search your library for a basic land card, put that card onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle. If you sang a song the whole time you were searching and shuffling, you may untap that land.

Checks and Balances

Cast this spell only if there are three or more players in the game.
Whenever a player casts a spell, each of that player's opponents may discard a card. If they do, counter that spell.

Topsy Turvy

The phases of each player's turn are reversed. (The phases are, in reverse order, ending, second main, combat, first main, and beginning.)
As long as there are more than two players in the game, the turn order is reversed.

Gifts Given

Search target opponent's library for four cards with different names and reveal them. That player chooses two of those cards. Put the chosen cards into the player's graveyard and the rest into your hand. Then that player shuffles their library.

Bog Humbugs

Flying
Whenever Bog Humbugs deals combat damage, hum that many notes of a festive song. If you can, put a +1/+1 counter on Bog Humbugs.

Five-Finger Discount

Put target nonland permanent into your hand. You may spend mana as though it were mana of any color the next time you cast that card.

Gimme Five

You gain 1 life for each person who high-fives you in the next thirty seconds. Each player in an Un-game who high-fives you gains 1 life. (Offer high fives. Don't hit people.)

Impounding Lot-Bot

When this creature enters, you may say "INCARCERATE!" in a robot voice. If you do, exile another target artifact or enchantment until this creature leaves the battlefield.

Fruitcake Elemental

Fruitcake Elemental is indestructible.
At the end of your turn, Fruitcake Elemental deals 7 damage to you.
{3}: Target player gains control of Fruitcake Elemental.

A Real Handful

As long as one or more hands are touching this creature, it gets +2/+2.
As long as two or more hands are touching this creature, it has menace.
As long as three or more hands are touching this creature, it has lifelink.

Pointy Finger of Doom

{3}, {T}: Spin this artifact in the middle of the table so that it rotates completely at least once, then destroy the closest permanent the finger points to.

Loose Lips

Enchant creature
As this Aura enters, choose a sentence with eight or fewer words.
Enchanted creature has flying.
Whenever enchanted creature deals damage to an opponent, that player may say the chosen sentence. If they don't, you draw two cards.

Water Gun Balloon Game

As this artifact enters, each player puts a pop! counter on "0."
Whenever a player casts a spell, move that player's pop! counter up one.
Whenever a player's pop! counter hits "5," that player creates a 5/5 pink Giant Teddy Bear creature token and resets all pop! counters to "0."

Command Tower

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Red-Hot Hottie

Whenever this creature deals damage to a creature, put a third-degree-burn counter on that creature. It gains "At the beginning of each end step, sacrifice this creature unless you scream 'Aaah!' at the top of your lungs."

Mine, Mine, Mine!

When this enchantment enters, each player puts their library into their hand.
Players have no maximum hand size and don't lose the game for drawing from an empty library.
Each player can't cast more than one spell each turn.
When this enchantment leaves the battlefield, each player shuffles their hand and graveyard into their library.

Prismatic Wardrobe

Destroy target nonartifact, nonland permanent that doesn't share a color with clothing worn by its controller.

Split Screen

When this artifact enters, shuffle your library and deal it into four libraries. If anything refers to your library, choose one of your libraries for it.
Play with your libraries' top cards revealed.
When this artifact leaves the battlefield, shuffle your libraries together.

Urza's Contact Lenses

This artifact enters tapped.
This artifact doesn't untap during your untap step.
As long as this artifact is untapped, all players play with their hands revealed.
Clap your hands twice: You may tap or untap this artifact.

Magical Hacker

{U}: Change the text of target spell or permanent by replacing all instances of + with -, and vice versa, until end of turn.

Swamp

Chaos Confetti

{4}, {T}: Tear this artifact into pieces. Throw the pieces onto the battlefield from a distance of at least five feet. Destroy each permanent that a piece touches. Remove the pieces from the game.

Get Your Head in the Game

Flash
When this enchantment enters, exile target nonland permanent until it (this card) leaves the battlefield, then touch it (this card) to your head. When it (this card) stops touching it (your head), sacrifice it (the card, not your head).

Blacker Lotus

{T}: Tear this artifact into pieces. Add four mana of any one color. Remove the pieces from the game.

Kill! Destroy!

Destroy target nonblack creature.
Gotcha — If an opponent says "kill" or "destroy," you may say "Gotcha!" When you do, return Kill! Destroy! from your graveyard to your hand.

Volrath's Motion Sensor

Enchant player
As this Aura enters, choose one of enchanted player's hands. That player balances this Aura on the back of that hand.
When this Aura falls off the chosen hand, sacrifice this Aura and enchanted player loses 3 life.

Psychic Network

Each player plays with the top card of their library held against their forehead, revealed to each other player.

Season's Beatings

Family gathering — Each creature target player controls deals damage equal to its power to another random creature that player controls.

Underdome

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add one mana of any color. Spend this mana only to pay Un-costs.

Whenever a creature deals damage to a player, that player may say "Ow" once for each permanent named Ow. If the player doesn't, this enchantment deals 1 damage to them.

Destroy target creature with reminder text. (Reminder text is any italicized text in parentheses that explains rules you already know.)

Now I Know My ABC's

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you control permanents with names that include all twenty-six letters of the English alphabet, you win the game.

Shipwreck Marsh

This land enters tapped unless you control two or more other lands.
{T}: Add {U} or {B}.

Gerrymandering

Exile all lands. Give each player a number of those cards chosen at random equal to the number of those cards the player controlled. Each player returns those cards to the battlefield under their control.

GO TO JAIL

When this enchantment enters, exile target creature an opponent controls until this enchantment leaves the battlefield.
At the beginning of the upkeep of the exiled card's owner, that player rolls two six-sided dice. If they roll doubles, sacrifice this enchantment.

Sly Spy

Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, that player loses a finger until this creature leaves the battlefield. (The finger is chosen by its owner and can't roll dice or touch cards.)

My First Tome

{1}, {T}: Say the flavor text on a card in your hand. Target opponent guesses that card's name. You may reveal that card. If you do and they guessed wrong, you draw a card.

Hot Fix

You have ten seconds to look at and rearrange the cards in your library. At the end of those ten seconds, if you're touching one or more of those cards, shuffle.

Blurry Beeble

Blurry (This creature can be blocked only if defending player was wearing glasses as it was cast.)
Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, you may draw a card. If you do, discard a card.

More or Less

Add or subtract 1 or one from a number or number word on target spell or permanent until end of turn.

Rules Lawyer

State-based actions don't apply to you or other permanents you control. (You don't lose the game due to having 0 or less life or drawing from an empty library. Your creatures aren't destroyed due to damage or deathtouch and aren't put into a graveyard due to having 0 or less toughness. Your planeswalkers aren't put into a graveyard if they have 0 loyalty. You don't put a legendary permanent into a graveyard if you control two with the same name. Counters aren't removed from your permanents due to game rules. Permanents you control attached or combined illegally remain on the battlefield. For complete rules and regulations, see rule 704.)

Goblin Mime

Clay Pigeon

Flying
{1}, Throw this creature into the air at least two feet above your head while seated: If you catch this creature with one hand, prevent all damage a source of your choice would deal to you this turn and tap this creature. Otherwise, sacrifice it.

As long as X is in X's owner's opponent's hand, X's owner may cast X and activate X's abilities. That opponent can't cast X and plays with their hand revealed.
{U}{B}, {T}: Put X into target opponent's hand.
{3}{U}{B}: You may play a land or cast a spell from the hand X is in. If you cast a spell this way, you cast it without paying its mana cost.

Burning Cinder Fury of Crimson Chaos Fire

Whenever any player taps a permanent, that player chooses one of their opponents. The chosen player gains control of that permanent at the beginning of the next end step.
At the beginning of each player's end step, if that player didn't tap any nonland permanents that turn, this enchantment deals 3 damage to that player.

This creature enters with a +1/+1 counter on it for each Magic game you have lost to one of your opponents since you last won a game against them.

Hoisted Hireling

This creature has flying as long as it's being held above the battlefield.

Double Header

Flying
When this creature enters, you may return target permanent with a two-word name to its owner's hand.

Drowned Catacomb

This land enters tapped unless you control an Island or a Swamp.
{T}: Add {U} or {B}.

Staff of the Letter Magus

As this artifact enters, choose a consonant other than N, R, S, or T.
Whenever a player casts a spell, you gain 1 life for each time the chosen letter appears in that spell's name.

Bureaucracy

Pursuant to subsection 3.1(4) of Richard's Rules of Order, at the beginning of the upkeep of each participant in this game of the Magic: The Gathering® trading card game (hereafter known as "PLAYER"), that PLAYER performs all actions in the sequence of previously added actions (hereafter known as "ACTION QUEUE"), in the order those actions were added, then adds another action to the end of the ACTION QUEUE. All actions must be simple physical or verbal actions that a player can perform while sitting in a chair, without jeopardizing the health and security of said PLAYER.
When any PLAYER does not perform all the prescribed actions in the correct order, sacrifice this enchantment and said PLAYER discards their complement of cards in hand (hereafter known as "HAND").

Working Stiff

As this creature enters, straighten your arms.
When you bend an elbow, sacrifice this creature.

Hangman

As this creature enters, secretly note a word with six to eight letters.
{1}: Target player who doesn't control this creature guesses the noted word or an unguessed letter in that word. If they guess wrong, put a +1/+1 counter on this creature. Any player may activate this ability.
When a player guesses the noted word or all of its letters, sacrifice this creature.

Island

Head to Head

You and target opponent play Seven Questions with the top card of that player's library. If you win, prevent all damage that would be dealt this turn by a source of your choice. (To play Seven Questions, that player looks at the card, then you ask up to six yes-or-no questions about the card that they answer truthfully. You guess the card's name—that's question seven—then the player reveals the card.)

Eye to Eye

You and target creature's controller have a staring contest. If you win, destroy that creature.