Exchange of Words

When Exchange of Words enters, choose two target creatures. For as long as Exchange of Words remains on the battlefield, exchange the text boxes of those creatures.

Sunken Hollow

({T}: Add {U} or {B}.)
Sunken Hollow enters tapped unless you control two or more basic lands.

Old-Fashioned Vampire

Flying
Old-Fashioned Vampire gets +2/+2 and has deathtouch as long as it's dark outdoors.

Mox Lotus

{T}: Add {∞}.
{100}: Add one mana of any color.

Graveyard Busybody

All graveyards are also your graveyards.
Graveyard Busybody's power and toughness are each equal to the number of cards with flavor text in your graveyards.

Fowl Play

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature loses all abilities and is a Bird creature with base power and toughness 1/1.

Entirely Normal Armchair

During your turn, if Entirely Normal Armchair is in your hand, you may hide it on the battlefield.
{0}: Return Entirely Normal Armchair to its owner's hand. Only your opponents may activate this ability and only if they see Entirely Normal Armchair.
{2}, Sacrifice Entirely Normal Armchair: Destroy target attacking creature.

Mother of Goons

Whenever a creature an opponent controls dies, sacrifice Mother of Goons unless you insult that creature.

Number Crunch

Return target permanent to its owner's hand.
Gotcha — If an opponent says a number, you may say "Gotcha!" When you do, return Number Crunch from your graveyard to your hand.

Spy Eye

Flying
Whenever Spy Eye deals combat damage to a player, you may draw a card from that player's library.

Censorship

As Censorship enters, choose a word.
Whenever a player says the chosen word, Censorship deals 2 damage to that player.

Dimir Aqueduct

Dimir Aqueduct enters tapped.
When Dimir Aqueduct enters, return a land you control to its owner's hand.
{T}: Add {U}{B}.

Waterfront District

Waterfront District enters tapped.
{T}: Add {U} or {B}.
{2}{U}{B}, {T}, Sacrifice Waterfront District: Draw a card.

S.N.E.A.K. Dispatcher

{2}{U}, {T}: Look at the top card of target player's library. If it has an Agents of S.N.E.A.K. watermark, you may reveal it and put it into your hand. Otherwise, put it on your choice of the top or bottom of its owner's library.

Zzzyxas's Abyss

At the beginning of your upkeep, destroy all nonland permanents with the first name alphabetically among nonland permanents.

Secret Base

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add one mana of any color. Spend this mana only to cast a spell that shares a watermark with Secret Base.

Arcane Signet

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Standard Procedure

{1}, Reveal Standard Procedure from your hand: Choose an instant or sorcery card with mana value 3 or less currently legal in the Standard format. Standard Procedure becomes that card until end of turn.

Split Screen

When Split Screen enters, shuffle your library and deal it into four libraries. If anything refers to your library, choose one of your libraries for it.
Play with your libraries' top cards revealed.
When Split Screen leaves the battlefield, shuffle your libraries together.

Gray Merchant of Alphabet

When Gray Merchant of Alphabet enters, choose a letter. For each creature you control that has the chosen letter in its name, you gain 1 life and each opponent loses 1 life.

Watermarket

{T}: Add {C}{C}. Spend this mana only to cast spells with watermarks.

Kill! Destroy!

Destroy target nonblack creature.
Gotcha — If an opponent says "kill" or "destroy," you may say "Gotcha!" When you do, return Kill! Destroy! from your graveyard to your hand.

Plate Spinning

Whenever you cast a spell, copy it and you may choose new targets for the copy. Then balance a card from outside the game on one of your fingertips. When that card falls or touches another card, sacrifice Plate Spinning.

Mobile Clone

Using a mobile device, take a picture of target creature. That device enters as a token that's a photocopy of the pictured creature. (Photocopies include Auras, Equipment, counters, and stickers in the shot. Don't touch other people's phones without permission and be careful if you do.)

Blue Ribbon

When Blue Ribbon enters, ask a person outside the game which creature you control is most deserving of a blue ribbon. Attach Blue Ribbon to that creature.
Equipped creature has best in show. (Whenever another creature becomes the target of a spell or ability you control, you may copy that spell or ability. If you do, the copy targets this creature.)
Equip {3}

Infernal Spawn of Evil

Flying, first strike
{1}{B}, Reveal Infernal Spawn of Evil from your hand, Say "It's coming!": Infernal Spawn of Evil deals 1 damage to target opponent or planeswalker. Activate only during your upkeep and only once each turn.

Contaminated Aquifer

({T}: Add {U} or {B}.)
Contaminated Aquifer enters tapped.

Magic Word

Enchant creature
As Magic Word enters, choose a word.
Whisper the chosen word: Tap enchanted creature.

Enter the Dungeon

Players play a Magic subgame under the table, starting at 5 life and using their libraries as their decks. The winner searches their library for two cards, puts those cards into their hand, then shuffles.

Hoisted Hireling

Hoisted Hireling has flying as long as it's being held above the battlefield.

Underdome

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add one mana of any color. Spend this mana only to pay Un-costs.

Deadhead

{0}: Return Deadhead from your graveyard to the battlefield. Activate only if an opponent isn't touching their hand (of cards).

Five-Finger Discount

Put target nonland permanent into your hand. You may spend mana as though it were mana of any color the next time you cast that card.

Eye to Eye

You and target creature's controller have a staring contest. If you win, destroy that creature.

Island

Phone a Friend

Call someone and ask them to choose one. If they don't answer, an opponent chooses one. (Don't explain anything else. You choose targets.)
• A — Gain control of target creature you don't control.
• B — Choose target creature you control. Create two tokens that are each copies of it.
• C — Take an extra turn after this one.
• D — Draw seven cards.

Swamp

Subcontract

A person outside the game looks at target opponent's hand and chooses a nonland card from it. That player discards that card.

Carnivorous Death-Parrot

Flying
At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Carnivorous Death-Parrot unless you say its flavor text.

Park Map

{1}, Sacrifice Park Map: Search your library for a land card that doesn't have the same art as a permanent you control, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Drowned Catacomb

Drowned Catacomb enters tapped unless you control an Island or a Swamp.
{T}: Add {U} or {B}.

Now I Know My ABC's

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you control permanents with names that include all twenty-six letters of the English alphabet, you win the game.

Clocknapper

When Clocknapper enters, choose beginning phase, first main phase, combat phase, postcombat main phase, or ending phase. Steal that phase from target player during their next turn. (That phase occurs as though it's your turn instead.)

When Fluffy Bunnies Attack

Target creature gets -X/-X until end of turn, where X is the number of times the letter of your choice appears in that creature's name.

Masterful Ninja

Haste
Reveal Masterful Ninja from your hand: Masterful Ninja is on the battlefield and in your hand until end of turn.
{1}{B}: Masterful Ninja gets +1/+1 until end of turn.

Knife and Death

Just a second (As long as this spell is on the stack, players can't move permanents.)
One at a time, throw ten cards you own from outside the game onto the playing area from a distance of at least three feet (about one meter). For each of those cards, Knife and Death deals 1 damage to each creature or planeswalker you don't control that card is touching. You gain life equal to the damage dealt this way.

Animate Library

Enchant your library
Enchanted library is an artifact creature on the battlefield with power and toughness each equal to the number of cards in it. It's still a library.
If enchanted library would leave the battlefield, exile Animate Library instead.

The Big Top

{T}: Add one mana of any color that appears on your top. (A top is an outerwear garment worn on the upper body.)

Busted!

Counter target spell unless its controller pays {X}, where X is the number of words in the name with the most words among permanents you control.

Pointy Finger of Doom

{3}, {T}: Spin Pointy Finger of Doom in the middle of the table so that it rotates completely at least once, then destroy the closest permanent the finger points to.

Dimir Signet

Fellwar Stone

{T}: Add one mana of any color that a land an opponent controls could produce.

Destroy target creature with reminder text. (Reminder text is any italicized text in parentheses that explains rules you already know.)

Rings a Bell

As Rings a Bell enters, choose a word with four or more letters.
After you say the chosen word for the first time each turn, an opponent may ring or imitate a bell within five seconds. When no opponent does, draw a card.

Nearby Planet

Rangeling (This card is every land type, including Plains, Island, Swamp, Mountain, Forest, Desert, Gate, Lair, Locus, and all those Urza's ones.)
Nearby Planet enters tapped.
When Nearby Planet enters, sacrifice it unless you pay {1}.

Decisions, Decisions

Reveal the top three cards of your library, then choose a consonant. (Y counts.) Put each card that has the chosen letter in the first word of its name from among them into your hand and the rest on the bottom of your library in any order.

Bag Check

Counter target spell, then ask a person outside the game if that spell looks dangerous to them. If they say yes, draw a card, then discard a card.

Crow Storm

Create a 1/2 blue Bird creature token with flying named Storm Crow.
Storm (When you cast this spell, copy it for each spell cast before it this turn.)

Urza's Fun House

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {∞}. Activate only once and only if you control an Urza's Mine, an Urza's Power-Plant, and an Urza's Tower.
{7}, {T}: Head to AskUrza.com and click Urza's Fun House.

Phyrexian Librarian

Flying, trample
At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top card of your library and balance it on your body.
When a balanced card falls or touches another balanced card, sacrifice Phyrexian Librarian.

Phoebe, Head of S.N.E.A.K.

Phoebe, Head of S.N.E.A.K. can't be blocked by creatures with flavor text.
{2}{U}{B}: Phoebe permanently steals target creature's text box. (That creature loses all rules text, flavor text, and watermarks. This creature gains them.)

Spell Counter

Counter target spell.
Gotcha — If an opponent says "spell" or "counter," you may say "Gotcha!" When you do, return Spell Counter from your graveyard to your hand.

capital offense

target creature gets -x/-x until end of turn, where x is the number of times a capital letter appears in its rules text. (ignore reminder text and flavor text.)

Volrath's Motion Sensor

Enchant player
As Volrath's Motion Sensor enters, choose one of enchanted player's hands. That player balances Volrath's Motion Sensor on the back of that hand.
When Volrath's Motion Sensor falls off the chosen hand, sacrifice Volrath's Motion Sensor and enchanted player loses 3 life.

Bronze Calendar

Spells you cast cost {1} less to cast.
You must speak in a voice other than your normal voice.
When you speak in your normal voice, sacrifice Bronze Calendar.

Exit Through the Grift Shop

Yell "Who wants a souvenir?" and announce the name of a nonland card in your graveyard. Each player in an Un-game who can hear you may bid life. You start the bidding at 0. The high bidder loses life equal to the high bid. They copy the card and may cast the copy without paying its mana cost. If you didn't win the bid, you gain life equal to the high bid and create that many Treasure tokens.

Vile Bile

Whenever a player's skin or fingernail touches Vile Bile, that player loses 2 life.

As long as X is in X's owner's opponent's hand, X's owner may cast X and activate X's abilities. That opponent can't cast X and plays with their hand revealed.
{U}{B}, {T}: Put X into target opponent's hand.
{3}{U}{B}: You may play a land or cast a spell from the hand X is in. If you cast a spell this way, you cast it without paying its mana cost.

Gleemax

You choose all targets for all spells and abilities.

Reliquary Tower

You have no maximum hand size.
{T}: Add {C}.

Sly Spy

Whenever Sly Spy deals combat damage to a player, that player reveals their hand. You choose a card from it with the longest name. That player discards that card.

How Is This a Par Three?!

Whenever you cast a spell, you may have target player mill X cards, where X is the number of words in that spell's name.

A Real Handful

As long as one or more hands are touching A Real Handful, it gets +2/+2.
As long as two or more hands are touching A Real Handful, it has menace.
As long as three or more hands are touching A Real Handful, it has lifelink.

More or Less

Add or subtract 1 or one from a number or number word on target spell or permanent until end of turn.

Cheatyface

If Cheatyface is in your hand, you may sneak Cheatyface onto the battlefield. If an opponent catches you right away, that player may exile Cheatyface.
Flying

Common Courtesy

Whenever a player casts a spell without asking your permission while casting it, counter that spell.
When a player asks you permission to cast a spell and you refuse, counter that spell and sacrifice Common Courtesy.

Very Cryptic Command

Choose two —
• Counter target black-bordered spell.
• Return target creature to its owner's hand.
• Untap each permanent you control with a watermark.
• Roll two six-sided dice. Target player mills X cards, where X is the total of those results.

Defective Detective

Defective Detective can't be blocked.
When Defective Detective enters, a person outside the game looks at target opponent's hand and chooses a card from it. That player reveals that card.

Kindslaver

{5}, {T}, Sacrifice Kindslaver: A person outside the game controls target player during that player's next turn. Neither player may advise that person until the end of that turn.

Animate Graveyard

Enchant your graveyard
Enchanted graveyard is a creature on the battlefield with base power and toughness each equal to the number of cards in it. It has the text boxes of all creature cards in it. It's still a graveyard.
If enchanted graveyard would leave the battlefield, instead exile Animate Graveyard.

Sol Ring

Avatar of Me

This spell costs {1} more to cast for each ten years you've been alive.
Avatar of Me's power is equal to your height in feet and its toughness is equal to your American shoe size. Round to the nearest ½.
Avatar of Me is the color of your eyes.

Double Take

Choose another player. You draw two cards. At the beginning of the first upkeep in your next game with that player, you draw two cards.