Very Cryptic Command

Choose two —
• Scry 3.
• Create a 2/2 black Rogue creature token with menace.
• Add or subtract 1 or one from a number or number word on target spell or permanent until end of turn.
• Return all artifacts target player controls to their owner's hand.

Goblin Game

Each player hides at least one item, then all players reveal them simultaneously. Each player loses life equal to the number of items they revealed. The player who revealed the fewest items then loses half their life, rounded up. If two or more players are tied for fewest, each loses half their life, rounded up.

Entirely Normal Armchair

During your turn, if Entirely Normal Armchair is in your hand, you may hide it on the battlefield.
{0}: Return Entirely Normal Armchair to its owner's hand. Only your opponents may activate this ability and only if they see Entirely Normal Armchair.
{2}, Sacrifice Entirely Normal Armchair: Destroy target attacking creature.

Face to Face

You and target opponent play a best two-out-of-three Rock, Paper, Scissors match. If you win, Face to Face deals 5 damage to that player.

Hurloon Wrangler

Denimwalk (This creature can't be blocked as long as defending player is wearing denim.)

Dumb Ass

At the beginning of your upkeep, flip a coin. If you lose the flip, target opponent chooses whether Dumb Ass attacks this turn.

Goblin S.W.A.T. Team

Say "Goblin S.W.A.T. Team": Put a +1/+1 counter on Goblin S.W.A.T. Team unless an opponent swats the table within five seconds. Activate only once each turn.

Common Courtesy

Whenever a player casts a spell without asking your permission while casting it, counter that spell.
When a player asks you permission to cast a spell and you refuse, counter that spell and sacrifice Common Courtesy.

Clay Pigeon

Flying
{1}, Throw Clay Pigeon into the air at least two feet above your head while seated: If you catch Clay Pigeon with one hand, prevent all damage a source of your choice would deal to you this turn and tap Clay Pigeon. Otherwise, sacrifice it.

Ashnod's Coupon

{T}, Sacrifice Ashnod's Coupon: Target player gets you target drink. You pay any costs for the drink.

Red-Hot Hottie

Whenever Red-Hot Hottie deals damage to a creature, put a third-degree-burn counter on that creature. It gains "At the beginning of each end step, sacrifice this creature unless you scream 'Aaah!' at the top of your lungs."

Infinity Elemental

Clambassadors

Whenever Clambassadors deals damage to a player, choose an artifact, creature, or land you control. That player gains control of that permanent.

Carnivorous Death-Parrot

Flying
At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Carnivorous Death-Parrot unless you say its flavor text.

It That Gets Left Hanging

When It That Gets Left Hanging enters, ask a person outside the game to high-five you. If they won't, It That Gets Left Hanging gains haste until end of turn.

Clam Session

As Clam Session enters, choose a word.
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may sing at least six words of a song, at least one of which is the chosen word. If you don't, sacrifice Clam Session. You can't repeat a song.

Cheatyface

If Cheatyface is in your hand, you may sneak Cheatyface onto the battlefield. If an opponent catches you right away, that player may exile Cheatyface.
Flying

Goblin Bookie

{R}, {T}: Reflip any coin or reroll any die. (Activate only any time it makes sense.)

Johnny, Combo Player

{4}: Search your library for a card, put that card into your hand, then shuffle.

Goblin Tutor

Roll a six-sided die. If you roll a 1, Goblin Tutor has no effect. Otherwise, search your library for the indicated card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.
2 — A card named Goblin Tutor
3 — An enchantment
4 — An artifact
5 — A creature
6 — An instant or sorcery

City of Ass

City of Ass enters tapped.
{T}: Add one and one-half mana of any one color.

Mouth to Mouth

Choose target opponent and target creature they control. You and that player have a breath-holding contest. If you win, you gain control of that creature.

Blurry Beeble

Blurry (This creature can be blocked only if defending player was wearing glasses as it was cast.)
Whenever Blurry Beeble deals combat damage to a player, you may draw a card. If you do, discard a card.

Richard Garfield, Ph.D.

You may play cards as though they were other cards of your choice with the same mana cost. You can't choose the same card twice. (Mana cost includes color.)

Strategy, Schmategy

Roll a six-sided die. Strategy, Schmategy has the indicated effect.
1 — Do nothing.
2 — Destroy all artifacts.
3 — Destroy all lands.
4 — Strategy, Schmategy deals 3 damage to each creature and each player.
5 — Each player discards their hand and draws seven cards.
6 — Repeat this process two more times.

Topsy Turvy

The phases of each player's turn are reversed. (The phases are, in reverse order, ending, second main, combat, first main, and beginning.)
As long as there are more than two players in the game, the turn order is reversed.

Mirror Mirror

Mirror Mirror enters tapped.
{7}, {T}, Sacrifice Mirror Mirror: Choose target player. At the beginning of the next end step, exchange life totals with that player, exchange control of all permanents you and that player control, and exchange cards in your hands, cards in your libraries, and cards in your graveyards.

Alexander Clamilton

Whenever you cast a wordy spell, scry 2. (A spell is wordy if it has four or more lines of rules text.)
{1}{R}, {T}: Choose target creature you don't control. Reveal the top card of your library. Alexander Clamilton gets +X/+0 until end of turn, where X is the number of lines of rules text of the revealed card. Alexander Clamilton fights that creature.

Sulfur Falls

Sulfur Falls enters tapped unless you control an Island or a Mountain.
{T}: Add {U} or {R}.

Witch Hunt

Players can't gain life.
At the beginning of your upkeep, Witch Hunt deals 4 damage to you.
At the beginning of your end step, target opponent chosen at random gains control of Witch Hunt.

Super-Duper Death Ray

Trample (This spell can deal excess damage to its target's controller.)
Super-Duper Death Ray deals 4 damage to target creature.

Graveyard Busybody

All graveyards are also your graveyards.
Graveyard Busybody's power and toughness are each equal to the number of cards with flavor text in your graveyards.

Izzet Boilerworks

Izzet Boilerworks enters tapped.
When Izzet Boilerworks enters, return a land you control to its owner's hand.
{T}: Add {U}{R}.

Magic Word

Enchant creature
As Magic Word enters, choose a word.
Whisper the chosen word: Tap enchanted creature.

Mirror March

Whenever a nontoken creature you control enters, flip a coin until you lose a flip. For each flip you won, create a token that's a copy of that creature. Those tokens gain haste. Exile them at the beginning of the next end step.

Mana Flare

Whenever a player taps a land for mana, that player adds one mana of any type that land produced.

Box of Free-Range Goblins

Roll a six-sided die. Create a number of 1/1 red Goblin creature tokens equal to the result.

Confusion in the Ranks

Whenever an artifact, creature, or enchantment enters, its controller chooses target permanent another player controls that shares a card type with it. Exchange control of those permanents.

Just Desserts

Just Desserts deals π damage to target creature. (π is the ratio of a circle's circumference to its diameter. (It's a smidgen more than 3.))

Wheel of Fortune

Each player discards their hand, then draws seven cards.

Wheel of Misfortune

Each player secretly chooses a number 0 or greater, then all players reveal those numbers simultaneously and determine the highest and lowest numbers revealed this way. Wheel of Misfortune deals damage equal to the highest number to each player who chose that number. Each player who didn't choose the lowest number discards their hand, then draws seven cards.

Whims of the Fates

Starting with you, each player separates all permanents they control into three piles. Then each player chooses one of their piles at random and sacrifices those permanents. (Piles can be empty.)

Blacker Lotus

{T}: Tear Blacker Lotus into pieces. Add four mana of any one color. Remove the pieces from the game.

Archaeomancer

When Archaeomancer enters, return target instant or sorcery card from your graveyard to your hand.

Expropriate

Council's dilemma — Starting with you, each player votes for time or money. For each time vote, take an extra turn after this one. For each money vote, choose a permanent owned by the voter and gain control of it. Exile Expropriate.

Possibility Storm

Whenever a player casts a spell from their hand, that player exiles it, then exiles cards from the top of their library until they exile a card that shares a card type with it. That player may cast that card without paying its mana cost. Then they put all cards exiled with Possibility Storm on the bottom of their library in a random order.

Strionic Resonator

{2}, {T}: Copy target triggered ability you control. You may choose new targets for the copy. (A triggered ability uses the words "when," "whenever," or "at.")

Wild Evocation

At the beginning of each player's upkeep, that player reveals a card at random from their hand. If it's a land card, the player puts it onto the battlefield. Otherwise, the player casts it without paying its mana cost if able.

Mindslaver

{4}, {T}, Sacrifice Mindslaver: You control target player during that player's next turn. (You see all cards that player could see and make all decisions for the player.)

Time Stretch

Target player takes two extra turns after this one.

Mountain

Staff of Domination

{1}: Untap Staff of Domination.
{2}, {T}: You gain 1 life.
{3}, {T}: Untap target creature.
{4}, {T}: Tap target creature.
{5}, {T}: Draw a card.

Island

Elixir of Immortality

{2}, {T}: You gain 5 life. Shuffle Elixir of Immortality and your graveyard into their owner's library.

Sol Ring

Thieves' Auction

Exile all nontoken permanents. Starting with you, each player chooses one of the exiled cards and puts it onto the battlefield tapped under their control. Repeat this process until all cards exiled this way have been chosen.

Chaos Warp

The owner of target permanent shuffles it into their library, then reveals the top card of their library. If it's a permanent card, they put it onto the battlefield.

Aeon Engine

Aeon Engine enters tapped.
{T}, Exile Aeon Engine: Reverse the game's turn order. (For example, if play had proceeded clockwise around the table, it now goes counterclockwise.)

Warp World

Each player shuffles all permanents they own into their library, then reveals that many cards from the top of their library. Each player puts all artifact, creature, and land cards revealed this way onto the battlefield, then does the same for enchantment cards, then puts all cards revealed this way that weren't put onto the battlefield on the bottom of their library.

Bolas's Citadel

You may look at the top card of your library any time.
You may play lands and cast spells from the top of your library. If you cast a spell this way, pay life equal to its mana value rather than pay its mana cost.
{T}, Sacrifice ten nonland permanents: Each opponent loses 10 life.

Rhystic Study

Whenever an opponent casts a spell, you may draw a card unless that player pays {1}.

Mages' Contest

You and target spell's controller bid life. You start the bidding with a bid of 1. In turn order, each player may top the high bid. The bidding ends if the high bid stands. The high bidder loses life equal to the high bid. If you win the bidding, counter that spell.

Command Tower

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Guttersnipe

Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, this creature deals 2 damage to each opponent.

Puppet's Verdict

Flip a coin. If you win the flip, destroy all creatures with power 2 or less. If you lose the flip, destroy all creatures with power 3 or greater.

Mana Drain

Counter target spell. At the beginning of your next main phase, add an amount of {C} equal to that spell's mana value.

Steam Vents

({T}: Add {U} or {R}.)
As Steam Vents enters, you may pay 2 life. If you don't, it enters tapped.

Etali, Primal Storm

Whenever Etali attacks, exile the top card of each player's library, then you may cast any number of spells from among those cards without paying their mana costs.

Consecrated Sphinx

Flying
Whenever an opponent draws a card, you may draw two cards.

Magus of the Wheel

{1}{R}, {T}, Sacrifice Magus of the Wheel: Each player discards their hand, then draws seven cards.

Training Center

Training Center enters tapped unless you have two or more opponents.
{T}: Add {U} or {R}.

Party Crasher

Haste
You can attack with Party Crasher once each combat during each opponent's turn.

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