Me, the Immortal

At the beginning of combat on your turn, put your choice of a +1/+1, first strike, vigilance, or menace counter on Me, the Immortal.
Counters remain on Me as it moves to any zone other than a player's hand or library.
You may cast Me from your graveyard by discarding two cards in addition to paying its other costs.

Ancestral Hot Dog Minotaur

{TK}{TK} — Afflict 2 (Whenever this creature becomes blocked, defending player loses 2 life.)
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Flying
{TK}{TK} — 1/4
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 8/6

Carnival Elephant Meteor

{TK}{TK} — Sacrifice this permanent: Draw two cards.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, proliferate. (Choose any number of permanents and/or players, then give each another counter of each kind already there.)
{TK}{TK} — 4/1
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 8/7

Contortionist Otter Storm

{TK}{TK} — {T}: Target creature gains haste until end of turn.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Deathtouch, lifelink
{TK}{TK} — 5/1
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 3/5

Cool Fluffy Loxodon

{TK}{TK} — When this permanent leaves the battlefield, draw a card.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever a creature enters under your control, this permanent becomes a 13/13 Eldrazi creature in addition to its other types until end of turn.
{TK}{TK} — 4/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 5/6

Cursed Firebreathing Yogurt

{TK}{TK} — Prowess, prowess (Whenever you cast a noncreature spell, this creature gets +1/+1 until end of turn twice.)
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — {2}, {T}: This permanent deals 2 damage to any target.
{TK}{TK} — 4/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 4/8

Deep-Fried Plague Myr

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, scry 1.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever this permanent leaves the battlefield, you may destroy target artifact or enchantment.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 4/5
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 8/4

Demonic Tourist Laser

{TK}{TK} — Outlast {1} ({1}, {T}: Put a +1/+1 counter on this creature. Outlast only as a sorcery.)
{TK}{TK}{TK} — When this permanent dies, you get seven {TK}.
{TK}{TK} — 1/4
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 9/6

Eldrazi Guacamole Tightrope

{TK}{TK} — Haste
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — You may cast this card from your graveyard by paying 2 life in addition to paying its other costs.
{TK}{TK} — 1/4
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 5/3

Elemental Time Flamingo

{TK}{TK} — Exile this permanent: You may cast target nonland card from your graveyard this turn.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever a creature you control dies, each opponent loses 1 life and you gain 1 life.
{TK}{TK} — 1/5
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 5/4

Eternal Acrobat Toast

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, exile target creature you control, then return it to the battlefield under it owner's control.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — {T}: Untap another target permanent.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 4/4
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 7/8

Familiar Beeble Mascot

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, untap target permanent.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever a creature enters under your control, creatures you control get +1/+1 until end of turn.
{TK}{TK} — 2/3
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 5/3

Geek Lotus Warrior

{TK}{TK} — {2}: This creature gets +2/+0 until end of turn.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever a creature enters under your control, this permanent deals 2 damage to target player.
{TK}{TK} — 4/1
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 3/6

Giant Mana Cake

{TK}{TK} — When this permanent leaves the battlefield, create two Food tokens. (They're artifacts with "{2}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.")
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — When this permanent dies, destroy target nonland permanent.
{TK}{TK} — 3/3
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/2

Goblin Coward Parade

{TK}{TK} — Mentor (Whenever this creature attacks, put a +1/+1 counter on target attacking creature with lesser power.)
{TK}{TK}{TK} — When this permanent leaves the battlefield, you may destroy target creature with power 4 or greater.
{TK}{TK} — 2/3
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 8/4

Happy Dead Squirrel

{TK}{TK} — {T}: Add {C}{C}. Spend this mana only to cast noncreature spells.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Infect (This permanent deals damage to creatures in the form of -1/-1 counters and to players in the form of poison counters.)
{TK}{TK} — 3/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 4/7

Jetpack Death Seltzer

{TK}{TK} — Trample
{TK}{TK}{TK} — {3}: Monstrosity 3. (If this creature isn't monstrous, put three +1/+1 counters on it and it becomes monstrous.)
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 2/7
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/5

Misunderstood Trapeze Elf

{TK}{TK} — Whenever you cast a spell, this creature gets +X/+X until end of turn, where X is the amount of generic mana in that spell's mana cost.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Hexproof
{TK}{TK} — 4/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/6

Mystic Doom Sandwich

{TK}{TK} — Lifelink
{TK}{TK}{TK} — This creature must be blocked if able. Whenever this creature becomes blocked, it gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each creature blocking it.
{TK}{TK} — 1/4
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/8

Narrow-Minded Baloney Fireworks

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, you gain 2 life.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Vigilance, reach
{TK}{TK} — 2/4
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 7/7

Night Brushwagg Ringmaster

{TK}{TK} — Menace
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Persist (When this permanent dies, if it had no -1/-1 counters on it, return it to the battlefield under its owner's control with a -1/-1 counter on it.)
{TK}{TK} — 2/3
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 10/10

Notorious Sliver War

{TK}{TK} — {5}: Creatures you control get +1/+1 until end of turn.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Protection from creatures with two or more creature types
{TK}{TK} — 3/3
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 9/6

Phyrexian Midway Bamboozle

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, you get {TK}.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Undying (When this creature dies, if it had no +1/+1 counters on it, return it to the battlefield under its owner's control with a +1/+1 counter on it.)
{TK}{TK} — 4/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/9

Playable Delusionary Hydra

{TK}{TK} — {T}: Draw a card, then discard a card.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, you gain 3 life and draw a card.
{TK}{TK} — 1/5
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 4/4

Primal Elder Kitty

{TK}{TK} — {1}: This creature gets +1/-1 until end of turn.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — When this creature dies, you may put X +1/+1 counters on target creature, where X is this creature's power.
{TK}{TK} — 5/1
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 4/7

Sassy Gremlin Blood

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, create a Treasure token.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — {3}: Target creature gains flying until end of turn.
{TK}{TK} — 3/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 10/10

Slimy Burrito Illusion

{TK}{TK} — Bushido 2 (Whenever this creature blocks or becomes blocked, it gets +2/+2 until end of turn.)
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Double strike
{TK}{TK} — 2/4
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 5/6

Snazzy Aether Homunculus

{TK}{TK} — {1}: Target creature gains all creature types until end of turn.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Magecraft — Whenever you cast or copy an instant or sorcery spell, draw a card.
{TK}{TK} — 2/4
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 8/7

Space Fungus Snickerdoodle

{TK}{TK} — Skulk (This creature can't be blocked by creatures with greater power.)
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Battle cry (Whenever this creature attacks, each other attacking creature gets +1/+0 until end of turn.)
{TK}{TK} — 3/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/8

Spooky Clown Mox

{TK}{TK} — Vigilance
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — {1}, {T}: Tap target creature.
{TK}{TK} — 1/5
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 5/4

Squid Fire Knight

{TK}{TK} — {T}: The next time target player would roll one or more dice this turn, instead they roll that many dice plus one, then you choose one of those rolls to ignore.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Protection from odd mana values
{TK}{TK} — 4/1
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/6

Squishy Sphinx Ninja

{TK}{TK} — Ward {2} (Whenever this creature becomes the target of a spell or ability an opponent controls, counter it unless that player pays {2}.)
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Provoke (Whenever this creature attacks, you may have target creature defending player controls untap and block it if able.)
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 5/3
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 7/7

Sticky Kavu Daredevil

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this permanent dies, you may return target creature to its owner's hand.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, creatures you control get +1/+1 until end of turn.
{TK}{TK} — 3/3
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 2/6

Trained Blessed Mind

{TK}{TK} — {T}: Exile target card from a graveyard.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Threshold — As long as seven or more cards are in your graveyard, this creature gets +4/+0 and has trample.
{TK}{TK} — 4/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/9

Trendy Circus Pirate

{TK}{TK} — Deathtouch
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, create that many 1/1 green Squirrel creature tokens.
{TK}{TK} — 5/1
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 3/6

Unassuming Gelatinous Serpent

{TK}{TK} — When this permanent dies, return target noncreature, nonland card from your graveyard to your hand.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, that player mills twice that many cards.
{TK}{TK} — 2/3
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 7/2

Unglued Pea-Brained Dinosaur

{TK}{TK} — {T}: Add {2}. Spend this mana only to cast creature spells.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — At the beginning of combat on your turn, target noncreature artifact you control becomes a 4/4 artifact creature with flying until end of turn.
{TK}{TK} — 2/4
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 8/6

Unhinged Beast Hunt

{TK}{TK} — {T}: You gain 1 life.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, tap each creature an opponent controls with the same power and/or same toughness as this creature.
{TK}{TK} — 4/1
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 2/6

Unique Charmed Pants

{TK}{TK} — {T}: Add one mana of any color.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, if it's not a Brushwagg, it gets +X/+0 until end of turn, where X is the number of supertypes, card types, and subtypes it has.
{TK}{TK} — 5/1
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 4/8

Unsanctioned Ancient Juggler

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, bolster 1. (Choose a creature with the least toughness among creatures you control and put a +1/+1 counter on it.)
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Indestructible
{TK}{TK} — 3/2
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 5/4

Unstable Robot Dragon

{TK}{TK} — {1}: Switch this creature's power and toughness until end of turn.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, it gets +5/+5 until end of turn.
{TK}{TK} — 3/2
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 2/7

Urza's Dark Cannonball

{TK}{TK} — Exalted, exalted (Whenever a creature you control attacks alone, it gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each instance of exalted among permanents you control.)
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Shadow (This creature can block or be blocked only by creatures with shadow.)
{TK}{TK} — 1/5
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 7/4

Vampire Champion Fury

{TK}{TK} — Hellbent — This creature gets +3/+3 as long as you have no cards in hand.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — {2}, Sacrifice this creature: It deals X damage divided as you choose among any number of target creatures, where X is its power.
{TK}{TK} — 1/5
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/3

Weird Angel Flame

{TK}{TK} — Heroic — Whenever you cast a spell that targets this permanent, put two +1/+1 counters on it.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Protection from even mana values
{TK}{TK} — 2/3
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 7/8

Werewolf Lightning Mage

{TK}{TK} — Landfall — Whenever a land enters under your control, put a +1/+1 counter on this permanent.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever a creature blocks this creature, that creature gets -4/-4 until end of turn.
{TK}{TK} — 4/1
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 3/5

Wild Ogre Bupkis

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, put a +1/+1 counter on it.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Metalcraft — This permanent has protection from noncreature permanents as long as you control three or more artifacts.
{TK}{TK} — 5/1
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 7/4

Wrinkly Monkey Shenanigans

{TK}{TK} — {1}: Target creature can't block this creature this turn.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Morbid — At the beginning of each end step, if a creature died this turn and this permanent is a creature, put a -1/-1 counter on this permanent and draw a card.
{TK}{TK} — 2/4
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 7/2

Yawgmoth Merfolk Soul

{TK}{TK} — When this permanent leaves the battlefield, target player discards a card.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — When this permanent leaves the battlefield, create five 1/1 white Clown Robot artifact creature tokens.
{TK}{TK} — 3/3
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/5

Zombie Cheese Magician

{TK}{TK} — First strike
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, draw that many cards.
{TK}{TK} — 3/3
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/2

Ambassador Blorpityblorpboop

When Ambassador Blorpityblorpboop enters, you get {TK}{TK}{TK}, then you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.
At the beginning of each combat, you may have Ambassador Blorpityblorpboop's base power become equal to the total power of all stickers on permanents you control and its base toughness become equal to those stickers' total toughness.

Baaallerina

Flying
When Baaallerina enters, you may put a name sticker on a nonland permanent you own.
{2}{U}: Another target creature with a name sticker on it gains flying until end of turn.

_____ Balls of Fire

When this enchantment enters, you may put a name sticker on it.
Whenever you put a sticker on this enchantment, it deals damage equal to the number of o's in name stickers on this enchantment to any target.

Big Winner

Big Winner has trample as long as you control a stickered permanent.

Bioluminary

Whenever Bioluminary deals combat damage to a player, you get {TK}{TK}, then you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

Chicken Troupe

Ward {2} (Whenever this creature becomes the target of a spell or ability an opponent controls, counter it unless that player pays {2}.)
When Chicken Troupe enters, you get {TK}, then you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

Clandestine Chameleon

When Clandestine Chameleon enters, you get {TK}{TK}, then you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.
Clandestine Chameleon has all abilities of ability stickers on other permanents you own and cards in your graveyard.

Command Performance

Choose two —
• Open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)
• Roll to visit your Attractions.
• You get {TK}{TK}.
• You may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

Croakid Amphibonaut

Croakid Amphibonaut has flying as long as you control a stickered permanent.

Done for the Day

At the beginning of your end step, if you control an Employee, a Performer, or a Robot, you may get {TK} or create a Treasure token. If you control all three, you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

Fight the _____ Fight

Enchant creature you control
When this Aura enters, you may put a name sticker on it. When you do, enchanted creature fights up to one target creature you don't control.
Enchanted creature gets +0/+2 for each name sticker on this Aura with eight or more letters.

Finishing Move

You get {TK}{TK}, then you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own. Target creature you control deals damage equal to its power to target creature you don't control.

Glitterflitter

Flying
When Glitterflitter enters, you get {TK}, then you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

_____ Goblin

When this creature enters, you may put a name sticker on it. Add {R} for each unique vowel on that sticker. (The vowels are A, E, I, O, U, and Y.)

Goblin Airbrusher

Whenever you place a sticker, create a Treasure token. If it's an art sticker, instead create two Treasure tokens. (They're artifacts with "{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color.")

Grabby Tabby

Grabby Tabby has vigilance as long as you control a stickered permanent.

Lineprancers

When Lineprancers enters, you get {TK}{TK}, then you may put a power and toughness sticker on a creature you own.
{3}{G}: Target creature you don't control blocks target creature you control with a power and toughness sticker on it other than Lineprancers this turn if able.

Make a _____ Splash

Flash
When this enchantment enters, you may put a name sticker on it.
Whenever you put a sticker on this enchantment, tap up to X target creatures, where X is the number of u's in name stickers on this enchantment.

Minotaur de Force

Haste
When Minotaur de Force enters, you get {TK}, then you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

_____-o-saurus

Trample
When this creature enters, you may put a name sticker on it. Put a +1/+1 counter on it for each unique vowel on that sticker. (The vowels are A, E, I, O, U, and Y.)

Prize Wall

Defender
{U}, {T}: You get {TK}.
{4}{U}, {T}: You may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own. Activate only as a sorcery.

Proficient Pyrodancer

When Proficient Pyrodancer enters, you may put an art sticker on a nonland permanent you own.
{2}{R}: Another target creature with an art sticker on it gets +2/+0 and gains menace until end of turn.

_____ _____ Rocketship

Flying
When this Vehicle enters, you may put up to two name stickers on it.
Whenever this Vehicle attacks, choose a letter. This Vehicle gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each name sticker on it that begins with the chosen letter.
Crew 2

Roxi, Publicist to the Stars

Flying
Roxi, Publicist to the Stars's power is equal to the number of permanents you control with an art sticker plus the number of cards in your graveyard with an art sticker.
When Roxi enters, distribute up to two art stickers among one or two nonland permanents you own.

Stiltstrider

Reach
When Stiltstrider enters, you get {TK}{TK}, then you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

Ticketomaton

When Ticketomaton enters, you get {TK}, then you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

_____ _____ _____ Trespasser

When this creature enters, you may put a name sticker on it.
{3}{U}: This creature gets +1/+0 until end of turn for each name sticker on it. It can't be blocked this turn.

Unlawful Entry

Target creature gets +1/+0 and gains flying until end of turn.
Whenever you put an art sticker on a creature, you may return Unlawful Entry from your graveyard to your hand.

Wee Champion

Whenever you place a sticker, Wee Champion gets +1/+1 until end of turn. If it's an art sticker, instead put a +1/+1 counter on Wee Champion.

Wicker Picker

Creature spells you cast have sticker kicker {1}. (You may pay an additional {1} as you cast a creature spell. If you do, you get {TK}, then you may put a sticker on it.)

Wizards of the _____

When this creature enters, you may put a name sticker on it, then look at the top X cards of your library, where X is the number of unique vowels on that sticker. Put one of those cards into your hand and the rest on the bottom of your library in any order. (The vowels are A, E, I, O, U, and Y.)

Blorbian Buddy

Trample
{G}, {T}: You get {TK} (a ticket counter).

Ticket Turbotubes

{T}: Add one mana of any color.
{3}, {T}: You get {TK} (a ticket counter).

Colossal Majesty

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you control a creature with power 4 or greater, draw a card.

Teferi's Time Twist

Exile target permanent you control. Return that card to the battlefield under its owner's control at the beginning of the next end step. If it enters as a creature, it enters with an additional +1/+1 counter on it.

Solemn Simulacrum

When Solemn Simulacrum enters, you may search your library for a basic land card, put that card onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle.
When Solemn Simulacrum dies, you may draw a card.

Agent's Toolkit

Agent's Toolkit enters with a +1/+1 counter, a flying counter, a deathtouch counter, and a shield counter on it. (If it would be dealt damage or destroyed, remove a shield counter from it instead.)
Whenever a creature you control enters, you may move a counter from Agent's Toolkit onto that creature.
{2}, Sacrifice Agent's Toolkit: Draw a card.

Beast Whisperer

Whenever you cast a creature spell, draw a card.

Beast Within

Destroy target permanent. Its controller creates a 3/3 green Beast creature token.

Bard Class

(Gain the next level as a sorcery to add its ability.)
Legendary creatures you control enter with an additional +1/+1 counter on them.
{R}{G}: Level 2
Legendary spells you cast cost {R}{G} less to cast. This effect reduces only the amount of colored mana you pay.
{3}{R}{G}: Level 3
Whenever you cast a legendary spell, exile the top two cards of your library. You may play them this turn.

Avian Oddity

Flying
Cycling {2}{U} ({2}{U}, Discard this card: Draw a card.)
When you cycle Avian Oddity, put a flying counter on target creature you control.

Candlekeep Sage

Commander creatures you own have "When this creature enters or leaves the battlefield, draw a card."

Command Tower

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Chaos Warp

The owner of target permanent shuffles it into their library, then reveals the top card of their library. If it's a permanent card, they put it onto the battlefield.

Eternal Witness

When Eternal Witness enters, you may return target card from your graveyard to your hand.

Evolution Sage

Landfall — Whenever a land you control enters, proliferate. (Choose any number of permanents and/or players, then give each another counter of each kind already there.)

Exchange of Words

When Exchange of Words enters, choose two target creatures. For as long as Exchange of Words remains on the battlefield, exchange the text boxes of those creatures.

Family's Favor

Whenever you attack, put a shield counter on target attacking creature. Until end of turn, it gains "Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, remove a shield counter from it. If you do, draw a card." (If a creature with a shield counter on it would be dealt damage or destroyed, remove a shield counter from it instead.)

Garruk's Uprising

When Garruk's Uprising enters, if you control a creature with power 4 or greater, draw a card.
Creatures you control have trample.
Whenever a creature you control with power 4 or greater enters, draw a card.

Guardian Project

Whenever a nontoken creature you control enters, if it doesn't have the same name as another creature you control or a creature card in your graveyard, draw a card.

Reliquary Tower

You have no maximum hand size.
{T}: Add {C}.

Path of Ancestry

Path of Ancestry enters tapped.
{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity. When that mana is spent to cast a creature spell that shares a creature type with your commander, scry 1. (Look at the top card of your library. You may put that card on the bottom.)