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Artifact
Whenever equipped creature attacks, put a +1/+1 counter on it. Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage, roll a d12. If the result is greater than the damage dealt or the result is 12, double the number of +1/+1 counters on that creature. Equip {2} ({2}: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.)
Equipped creature gets +2/+2 and has protection from blue and from black. Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, surveil 2. Then you may cast an instant or sorcery spell with mana value 2 or less from your graveyard without paying its mana cost. If that spell would be put into your graveyard, exile it instead. Equip {2}
Equipped creature gets +2/+2 and has protection from white and from blue. Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, put a +1/+1 counter on a creature you control, then proliferate. (Choose any number of permanents and/or players, then give each another counter of each kind already there.) Equip {2}
Equipped creature gets +2/+2 and has protection from red and from white. Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, Sword of War and Peace deals damage to that player equal to the number of cards in their hand and you gain 1 life for each card in your hand. Equip {2}
Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, look at that many cards from the top of your library. You may exile a nonland card from among them. Put the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order. You may cast the exiled card without paying its mana cost. Equip {2}{U}
Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage, put two charge counters on Umezawa's Jitte. Remove a charge counter from Umezawa's Jitte: Choose one — • Equipped creature gets +2/+2 until end of turn. • Target creature gets -1/-1 until end of turn. • You gain 2 life. Equip {2}
Cheating Costs
Draw
Whenever Acquisition Octopus or equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, draw a card. Reconfigure {2} ({2}: Attach to target creature you control; or unattach from a creature. Reconfigure only as a sorcery. While attached, this isn't a creature.)
Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, scry 1, then draw a card. (To scry 1, look at the top card of your library, then you may put that card on the bottom of your library.) Equip {2} ({2}: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.)
Funny Card Go Burr
Living weapon (When this Equipment enters the battlefield, create a 0/0 black Phyrexian Germ creature token, then attach this to it.) Equipped creature gets +1/+1. Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, that player loses half their life, rounded up. Equip {3}
Ramp/Fixing
Equipped creature gets +1/+1. Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, create a Treasure token. (It's an artifact with "{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color.") Equip {1} ({1}: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.)
Reach Modified creatures you control have trample. (Equipment, Auras you control, and counters are modifications.) Whenever a modified creature you control deals combat damage to a player, search your library for a basic land card, put it onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle.
Equipped creature gets +1/+0. Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, create a Treasure token. (It's an artifact with "{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color.") Equip {2} ({2}: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.)
Equipped creature gets +2/+2 and has protection from red and from green. Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, exile the top two cards of your library. You may play those cards this turn. You may play an additional land this turn. Equip {2}
Equipped creature gets +2/+2 and has protection from green and from white. Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, exile up to one target creature you own, then search your library for a basic land card. Put both cards onto the battlefield under your control, then shuffle. Equip {2}
Equipped creature gets +2/+2 and has protection from instants and from sorceries. Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, create a Treasure token. When you next cast an instant or sorcery spell this turn, copy that spell. You may choose new targets for the copy. Equip {2}
Tutor
Maybeboard
Living weapon (When this Equipment enters the battlefield, create a 0/0 black Phyrexian Germ creature token, then attach this to it.) Equipped creature gets +1/+1. Whenever equipped creature attacks, you may search your library for a basic land card, put it onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle. Equip {3}
Enchant creature Enchanted creature has "Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, draw a card." As long as enchanted creature is legendary, it gets +1/+1 and has ward {1}. (Whenever enchanted creature becomes the target of a spell or ability an opponent controls, counter it unless that player pays {1}.)
Whenever you cast an Aura or Equipment spell, put a +1/+1 counter on Mister Gutsy. When Mister Gutsy dies, create X Junk tokens, where X is the number of +1/+1 counters on it. (They're artifacts with "{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Exile the top card of your library. You may play that card this turn. Activate only as a sorcery.")
Equipped creature gets +1/+1 for each Aura and Equipment attached to it and has ward {2}. (Whenever equipped creature becomes the target of a spell or ability an opponent controls, counter it unless that player pays {2}.) Equip {2} ({2}: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.)
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