AWOL

Exile target attacking creature. Then remove it from the game. Then put it into the absolutely-removed-from-the-freaking-game-forever zone.

Very Cryptic Command

Choose two —
• Return target permanent to its controller's hand.
• Draw two cards, then discard a card.
• Change the target of target spell with a single target.
• Turn over target nontoken creature.

Summon the Pack

Open a sealed Magic booster pack, reveal the cards, and put all creature cards revealed this way onto the battlefield under your control. They're Zombies in addition to their other types. (Remove those cards from your deck before beginning a new game.)

My First Tome

{1}, {T}: Say the flavor text on a card in your hand. Target opponent guesses that card's name. You may reveal that card. If you do and they guessed wrong, you draw a card.

Thopter Pie Network

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you're eating, create a 1/1 colorless Thopter artifact creature token with flying. Use food to represent the token.
Whenever a creature token you control dies, if it's represented by food, eat it.

Last-Minute Chopping

Ask target opponent if they remembered to get you a present. If they say yes, they put a card they own from outside the game into your hand. Otherwise, you gain control of target permanent they control.

Trigger Happy

Choose a triggered ability of target permanent. It triggers. You control that ability.

Cardboard Carapace

Enchant creature
For each other card named Cardboard Carapace you have with you outside the game, enchanted creature gets +1/+1.

Hangman

As this creature enters, secretly note a word with six to eight letters.
{1}: Target player who doesn't control this creature guesses the noted word or an unguessed letter in that word. If they guess wrong, put a +1/+1 counter on this creature. Any player may activate this ability.
When a player guesses the noted word or all of its letters, sacrifice this creature.

Goblin Tutor

Roll a six-sided die. If you roll a 1, Goblin Tutor has no effect. Otherwise, search your library for the indicated card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.
2 — A card named Goblin Tutor
3 — An enchantment
4 — An artifact
5 — A creature
6 — An instant or sorcery

Selfie Preservation

Search your library for a basic land card and reveal it. If there's a tree in its art, put it onto the battlefield tapped. Otherwise, put it into your hand. Then shuffle.

Mad Science Fair Project

{T}: Roll a six-sided die. On a 3 or lower, target player adds {C}. Otherwise, that player adds one mana of any color they choose.

Snow Mercy

Whenever a creature deals damage to you, put a globe counter on it.
{T}, {Q}, {T}, {Q}, {T}: Tap all creatures with globe counters on them.

Evil Presents

Put a creature card from your hand into play under target opponent's control. That creature attacks each turn if able . . . and always attacks its controller.

Stocking Tiger

Stocking Tiger enters with a sealed Magic booster pack under it.
When Stocking Tiger deals combat damage to a player, unwrap the booster pack and put it into your hand.

Pointy Finger of Doom

{3}, {T}: Spin this artifact in the middle of the table so that it rotates completely at least once, then destroy the closest permanent the finger points to.

Chaos Wrap

The owner of target permanent shuffles it into their library. Then they may look at the top card of their library and may wrap it. If it's a permanent card, they may put it onto the battlefield. Otherwise, they may put it onto the battlefield face down as a 4/4 red Present creature. (To wrap a card, put it inside lots of sleeves. If it would be dealt damage or destroyed, remove a sleeve from it instead.)

Bar Entry

Choose one —
• Destroy target creature with power 4 or greater.
• Destroy target creature with any part of its head higher than the bar. (Align the tops of both cards to check.)

Ice Tunnel

({T}: Add {U} or {B}.)
This land enters tapped.

Plains

Watermarket

{T}: Add {C}{C}. Spend this mana only to cast spells with watermarks.

Generated Horizons

At the beginning of your upkeep, create a Forest land token.

Autograph Book

This artifact enters with a page counter on it for each person who has signed it.
{3}, {T}, Remove a page counter from this artifact: Draw a card.

Gifts Given

Search target opponent's library for four cards with different names and reveal them. That player chooses two of those cards. Put the chosen cards into the player's graveyard and the rest into your hand. Then that player shuffles their library.

Druid of the Sacred Beaker

{T}: Add {G} for each Crossbreed Labs watermark among permanents you control.

Glacial Floodplain

({T}: Add {W} or {U}.)
This land enters tapped.

Fruitcake Elemental

Fruitcake Elemental is indestructible.
At the end of your turn, Fruitcake Elemental deals 7 damage to you.
{3}: Target player gains control of Fruitcake Elemental.

Crystal Quarry

{T}: Add {C}.
{5}, {T}: Add {W}{U}{B}{R}{G}.

GO TO JAIL

When this enchantment enters, exile target creature an opponent controls until this enchantment leaves the battlefield.
At the beginning of the upkeep of the exiled card's owner, that player rolls two six-sided dice. If they roll doubles, sacrifice this enchantment.

Everythingamajig

{T}: Add one mana of any color.
{1}, {T}: Say the flavor text on a card in your hand. Target opponent guesses that card's name. You may reveal that card. If you do and your opponent guessed wrong, draw a card.
{8}, {T}: This artifact deals 12 damage to target creature.

Loose Lips

Enchant creature
As this Aura enters, choose a sentence with eight or fewer words.
Enchanted creature has flying.
Whenever enchanted creature deals damage to an opponent, that player may say the chosen sentence. If they don't, you draw two cards.

Mountain

Strategy, Schmategy

Roll a six-sided die. Strategy, Schmategy has the indicated effect.
1 — Do nothing.
2 — Destroy all artifacts.
3 — Destroy all lands.
4 — Strategy, Schmategy deals 3 damage to each creature and each player.
5 — Each player discards their hand and draws seven cards.
6 — Repeat this process two more times.

Destroy target creature with reminder text. (Reminder text is any italicized text in parentheses that explains rules you already know.)

Who // What // When // Where // Why

The Big Top

{T}: Add one mana of any color that appears on your top. (A top is an outerwear garment worn on the upper body.)

Ashnod's Coupon

{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Target player gets you target drink. You pay any costs for the drink.

Question Elemental?

Did you know this creature has flying?
Are you aware that any time you say something that isn't a question, when a player points out this fact first, they gain control of this creature?

Thespian's Stage

{T}: Add {C}.
{2}, {T}: This land becomes a copy of target land, except it has this ability.

Mishra's Toy Workshop

{T}: Add {C}{C}{C}. Spend this mana only on spells and abilities that put tokens onto the battlefield. Use toys to represent the tokens.

Urza, Academy Headmaster

+1: Head to AskUrza.com and click +1.
−1: Head to AskUrza.com and click -1.
−6: Head to AskUrza.com and click -6.

Oddly Uneven

Choose one —
• Destroy each creature with an odd number of words in its name. (Hyphenated words are one word.)
• Destroy each creature with an even number of words in its name.

Yule Ooze

At the beginning of your upkeep, destroy another nonland permanent chosen at random, then put a number of +1/+1 counters on Yule Ooze equal to that permanent's converted mana cost.
{R}{G}, Eat some food: Regenerate Yule Ooze.

Exit Through the Grift Shop

Yell "Who wants a souvenir?" and announce the name of a nonland card in your graveyard. Each player in an Un-game who can hear you may bid life. You start the bidding at 0. The high bidder loses life equal to the high bid. They copy the card and may cast the copy without paying its mana cost. If you didn't win the bid, you gain life equal to the high bid and create that many Treasure tokens.

Island

Snow-Covered Swamp

Spara's Headquarters

({T}: Add {G}, {W}, or {U}.)
This land enters tapped.
Cycling {3} ({3}, Discard this card: Draw a card.)

Underdome

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add one mana of any color. Spend this mana only to pay Un-costs.

Bronze Calendar

Spells you cast cost {1} less to cast.
You must speak in a voice other than your normal voice.
When you speak in your normal voice, sacrifice this artifact.

Snow-Covered Forest

Entirely Normal Armchair

During your turn, if this card is in your hand, you may hide it on the battlefield.
{0}: Return this artifact to its owner's hand. Only your opponents may activate this ability and only if they see this artifact.
{2}, Sacrifice this artifact: Destroy target attacking creature.

Arctic Treeline

({T}: Add {G} or {W}.)
This land enters tapped.

Alpine Meadow

({T}: Add {R} or {W}.)
This land enters tapped.

Johnny, Combo Player

{4}: Search your library for a card, put that card into your hand, then shuffle.

Letter Bomb

When this artifact enters, sign it and shuffle it into target player's library. That player reveals each card they draw until they draw this card. When that player draws this card, it deals 19½ damage to them.

Bog Humbugs

Flying
Whenever Bog Humbugs deals combat damage, hum that many notes of a festive song. If you can, put a +1/+1 counter on Bog Humbugs.

Surgeon General Commander

Whenever you augment, enchant, or mutate a creature you control, draw a card.
{T}: Add {W}, {U}, {B}, {R}, or {G}.

Nice

Search your library for a card and put it into another target player's hand. Then shuffle your library.

Naughty

Search another target player's library for a card and put that card into your hand. Then shuffle that player's library.

Naughty // Nice

Now I Know My ABC's

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you control permanents with names that include all twenty-six letters of the English alphabet, you win the game.

Seasonal Sequels

Pitch the titles of up to X holiday-themed sequels to target spell. Copy that spell for each title pitched, except the copy has that name. You may choose new targets for the copies. (Simply adding numbers isn't festive enough.)

Opening Ceremony

Add {W}{U}{B}{R}{G}{C}. You may open a sealed Magic booster pack. Until end of turn, you may cast spells from among the cards in that booster pack.

Urza's Fun House

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {∞}. Activate only once and only if you control an Urza's Mine, an Urza's Power-Plant, and an Urza's Tower.
{7}, {T}: Head to AskUrza.com and click this land.

Jumbo Imp

Flying
As this creature enters, roll a six-sided die. This creature enters with a number of +1/+1 counters on it equal to the result.
At the beginning of your upkeep, roll a six-sided die and put a number of +1/+1 counters on this creature equal to the result.
At the beginning of your end step, roll a six-sided die and remove a number of +1/+1 counters from this creature equal to the result.

Season's Beatings

Family gathering — Each creature target player controls deals damage equal to its power to another random creature that player controls.

Rimewood Falls

({T}: Add {G} or {U}.)
This land enters tapped.

Booster Tutor

Open a sealed Magic booster pack, reveal the cards, and put one of them into your hand. (Remove that card from your deck before beginning a new game.)

Common Courtesy

Whenever a player casts a spell without asking your permission while casting it, counter that spell.
When a player asks you permission to cast a spell and you refuse, counter that spell and sacrifice this enchantment.

Highland Forest

({T}: Add {R} or {G}.)
This land enters tapped.

Snowfield Sinkhole

({T}: Add {W} or {B}.)
This land enters tapped.

Flavor Judge

{T}: Choose target spell or ability that targets a permanent you control. Then ask a person outside the game if the story of what will happen makes sense. If they say no, sacrifice this creature and counter that spell or ability.

Ineffable Blessing

As this enchantment enters, choose Flavorful or Bland.
• Flavorful — Whenever a creature you control with flavor text enters, draw a card.
• Bland — Whenever a creature you control without flavor text enters, draw a card.

Nearby Planet

Rangeling (This card is every land type, including Plains, Island, Swamp, Mountain, Forest, Desert, Gate, Lair, Locus, and all those Urza's ones.)
This land enters tapped.
When this land enters, sacrifice it unless you pay {1}.

Bumbling Pangolin

When this creature enters, you may destroy target artifact.

Phone a Friend

Call someone and ask them to choose one. If they don't answer, an opponent chooses one. (Don't explain anything else. You choose targets.)
• A — Gain control of target creature you don't control.
• B — Choose target creature you control. Create two tokens that are each copies of it.
• C — Take an extra turn after this one.
• D — Draw seven cards.

Timmy, Power Gamer

{4}: You may put a creature card from your hand onto the battlefield.

Jack-in-the-Mox

{T}: Roll a six-sided die. This ability has the indicated effect.
1 — Sacrifice this artifact and you lose 5 life.
2 — Add {W}.
3 — Add {U}.
4 — Add {B}.
5 — Add {R}.
6 — Add {G}.

Stack of Paperwork

When Stack of Paperwork enters, draw a card.
Combat damage uses the stack. (Combat damage assignment can be responded to before damage is dealt.)

Wild Crocodile

When this creature enters, search your library for a basic land card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Woodland Chasm

({T}: Add {B} or {G}.)
This land enters tapped.

Goblin Sleigh Ride

Target creature you control climbs into Goblin Sleigh Ride. You slide them on their merry way. If the creature stayed on, it deals damage equal to its toughness to each other creature touched during the slide.

Shimmerdrift Vale

This land enters tapped.
As this land enters, choose a color.
{T}: Add one mana of the chosen color.

Land Aid '04

Search your library for a basic land card, put that card onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle. If you sang a song the whole time you were searching and shuffling, you may untap that land.

Killer Cosplay

Whenever this Equipment becomes attached to a creature, choose a creature card name with an identical mana cost. That creature becomes a copy of the card with the chosen name until this Equipment becomes unattached from it.
Equip {3}

Volatile Fjord

({T}: Add {U} or {R}.)
This land enters tapped.

Topdeck the Halls

Decorated cards in your hand have miracle {S}. (Decorated cards include premiums, promos, and cards with alternate frames or art.)
At the beginning of your upkeep, if you control twelve or more decorated permanents, you win the game.

Super Secret Tech

Premium spells cost {1} less to cast.
Premium creatures get +1/+1.

B-I-N-G-O

Trample
Whenever a player casts a spell, put a chip counter on its mana value.
This creature gets +9/+9 for each set of three numbers in a row with chip counters on them.

Sulfurous Mire

({T}: Add {B} or {R}.)
This land enters tapped.

Checks and Balances

Cast this spell only if there are three or more players in the game.
Whenever a player casts a spell, each of that player's opponents may discard a card. If they do, counter that spell.

Amateur Auteur

Sacrifice this creature: Destroy target enchantment.

Have

Getting

Don't Have

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