Don't Have

Attempted Murder

Choose target creature. Roll X six-sided dice. For each even result, put two -1/-1 counters on that creature. For each odd result, create a 1/2 blue Bird creature token with flying named Storm Crow.

Pointy Finger of Doom

{3}, {T}: Spin Pointy Finger of Doom in the middle of the table so that it rotates completely at least once, then destroy the closest permanent the finger points to.

Swamp

Rock Lobster

Creatures named Scissors Lizard can't attack or block.

B.O.B. (Bevy of Beebles)

As B.O.B. enters, create four 1/1 blue Beeble creature tokens.
The number of loyalty counters on B.O.B. is equal to the number of Beebles you control. (Create or sacrifice Beebles whenever B.O.B. gains or loses loyalty.)
+1: Up to X target Beebles can't be blocked this turn, where X is the number of cards in your hand.
−1: Draw a card.

Scared Stiff

Scared Stiff has menace as long you control a stickered permanent.

Make a _____ Splash

Flash
When this enchantment enters, you may put a name sticker on it.
Whenever you put a sticker on this enchantment, tap up to X target creatures, where X is the number of u's in name stickers on this enchantment.

Wizards of the _____

When this creature enters, you may put a name sticker on it, then look at the top X cards of your library, where X is the number of unique vowels on that sticker. Put one of those cards into your hand and the rest on the bottom of your library in any order. (The vowels are A, E, I, O, U, and Y.)

Mox Lotus

{T}: Add {∞}.
{100}: Add one mana of any color.

_____ _____ _____ Trespasser

When this creature enters, you may put a name sticker on it.
{3}{U}: This creature gets +1/+0 until end of turn for each name sticker on it. It can't be blocked this turn.

Ticketomaton

When Ticketomaton enters, you get {TK}, then you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

City of Ass

City of Ass enters tapped.
{T}: Add one and one-half mana of any one color.

Boing!

Return target creature to its owner's hand, then roll a six-sided die. If the result is 3 or less, scry a number of cards equal to the result.

Exchange of Words

When Exchange of Words enters, choose two target creatures. For as long as Exchange of Words remains on the battlefield, exchange the text boxes of those creatures.

Summon the Pack

Open a sealed Magic booster pack, reveal the cards, and put all creature cards revealed this way onto the battlefield under your control. They're Zombies in addition to their other types. (Remove those cards from your deck before beginning a new game.)

Treacherous Trapezist

Flying
Whenever you cast an alliterative spell, scry 2. (Anything with two or more capitalized words in its name that begin with the same letter is alliterative.)
Other alliterative creatures you control have flying.

Monitor Monitor

When Monitor Monitor enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)
Once each turn, you may pay {1} to reroll one or more dice you rolled.

Motion Sickness

Enchant creature
When Motion Sickness enters, tap enchanted creature.
Enchanted creature doesn't untap during its controller's untap step.
Whenever you visit an Attraction, you may attach Motion Sickness to target tapped creature.

Discourtesy Clerk

When Discourtesy Clerk enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)
At the beginning of your end step, if you control three or more Attractions, you draw a card and you lose 1 life.

Mobile Clone

Using a mobile device, take a picture of target creature. That device enters as a token that's a photocopy of the pictured creature. (Photocopies include Auras, Equipment, counters, and stickers in the shot. Don't touch other people's phones without permission and be careful if you do.)

Super Secret Tech

Premium spells cost {1} less to cast.
Premium creatures get +1/+1.

Ticket Turbotubes

{T}: Add one mana of any color.
{3}, {T}: You get {TK} (a ticket counter).

Scampire

When Scampire enters, you get {TK}, then you may put a sticker on a creature card in your graveyard.
{3}{B}: Return target creature card with a sticker on it from your graveyard to the battlefield. That creature gains haste. Exile it at the beginning of the next end step. Activate only as a sorcery.

Animate Library

Enchant your library
Enchanted library is an artifact creature on the battlefield with power and toughness each equal to the number of cards in it. It's still a library.
If enchanted library would leave the battlefield, exile Animate Library instead.

Clown Car

When Clown Car enters, roll X six-sided dice. For each odd result, create a 1/1 white Clown Robot artifact creature token. For each even result, put a +1/+1 counter on Clown Car.
Crew 2

Last Voyage of the _____

When this enchantment enters, you may put a name sticker on it, then it becomes an Aura with enchant creature. Return a creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield and attach this Aura to it.
Enchanted creature gets +2/+0 for each name sticker on this Aura with seven or fewer letters.
When this Aura leaves the battlefield, sacrifice enchanted creature.

"Lifetime" Pass Holder

"Lifetime" Pass Holder enters tapped.
When "Lifetime" Pass Holder dies, open an Attraction.
Whenever you roll to visit your Attractions, if you roll a 6, you may return "Lifetime" Pass Holder from your graveyard to the battlefield.

Quick Fixer

Menace
Whenever Quick Fixer deals combat damage to a player, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Water Gun Balloon Game

As Water Gun Balloon Game enters, each player puts a pop! counter on "0."
Whenever a player casts a spell, move that player's pop! counter up one.
Whenever a player's pop! counter hits "5," that player creates a 5/5 pink Giant Teddy Bear creature token and resets all pop! counters to "0."

Xenosquirrels

Xenosquirrels enters with two +1/+1 counters on it.
After you roll a die, you may remove a +1/+1 counter from Xenosquirrels. If you do, increase or decrease the result by 1.

Dissatisfied Customer

Flying, haste
When Dissatisfied Customer enters, roll a six-sided die. If the result is 3 or less, you lose that much life.

Strength-Testing Hammer

Whenever equipped creature attacks, roll a six-sided die. That creature gets +X/+0 until end of turn, where X is the result. Then if it has the greatest power or is tied for greatest power among creatures on the battlefield, draw a card.
Equip {3}

Standard Procedure

{1}, Reveal Standard Procedure from your hand: Choose an instant or sorcery card with mana value 3 or less currently legal in the Standard format. Standard Procedure becomes that card until end of turn.

Soul Swindler

As long as you've visited an Attraction this turn, Soul Swindler has indestructible. (Damage and effects that say "destroy" don't destroy it.)
When Soul Swindler enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Night Shift of the Living Dead

After you roll a die, you may pay 1 life. If you do, increase or decrease the result by 1. Do this only once each turn.
Whenever you roll a 6, create a 2/2 black Zombie Employee creature token.

Dee Kay, Finder of the Lost

When Dee Kay, Finder of the Lost enters, open an Attraction.
Whenever you roll a 2, each opponent loses 1 life and you gain 1 life.
Whenever you roll a 4, you may tap or untap target artifact or creature.
Whenever you roll a 6, return target creature card from your graveyard to your hand.

Command Performance

Choose two —
• Open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)
• Roll to visit your Attractions.
• You get {TK}{TK}.
• You may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

Knife and Death

Just a second (As long as this spell is on the stack, players can't move permanents.)
One at a time, throw ten cards you own from outside the game onto the playing area from a distance of at least three feet (about one meter). For each of those cards, Knife and Death deals 1 damage to each creature or planeswalker you don't control that card is touching. You gain life equal to the damage dealt this way.

Celebr-8000

At the beginning of combat on your turn, roll two six-sided dice. For each result of 1, Celebr-8000 gets +1/+1 until end of turn. For each other result, it gains the indicated ability until end of turn. If you rolled doubles, it also gains double strike until end of turn.
• 2 — menace
• 3 — vigilance
• 4 — lifelink
• 5 — flying
• 6 — indestructible

Scissors Lizard

Creatures named Paper Tiger can't attack or block.

Six-Sided Die

Choose target creature. Roll a six-sided die.
1 — It has base toughness 1 until end of turn.
2 — Put two -1/-1 counters on it.
3 — Six-Sided Die deals 3 damage to it and you gain 3 life.
4 — It gets -4/-4 until end of turn.
5 — Destroy it.
6 — Exile it.

Black Hole

Destroy target creature and up to X other target creatures, where X is the number of Attractions you've visited this turn.

_____ _____ Rocketship

Flying
When this Vehicle enters, you may put up to two name stickers on it.
Whenever this Vehicle attacks, choose a letter. This Vehicle gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each name sticker on it that begins with the chosen letter.
Crew 2

Draconian Gate-Bot

When Draconian Gate-Bot enters, choose one —
• Open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)
• Destroy target Attraction. (It's put into its owner's junkyard.)

Phone a Friend

Call someone and ask them to choose one. If they don't answer, an opponent chooses one. (Don't explain anything else. You choose targets.)
• A — Gain control of target creature you don't control.
• B — Choose target creature you control. Create two tokens that are each copies of it.
• C — Take an extra turn after this one.
• D — Draw seven cards.

Step Right Up

Open two Attractions. (Put the top two cards of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Wolf in _____ Clothing

When this creature enters, you may put a name sticker on it. When you do, up to X target creatures each get -1/-1 until end of turn, where X is the number of unique vowels on that sticker. (The vowels are A, E, I, O, U, and Y.)

Island

Seasoned Buttoneer

When Seasoned Buttoneer enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Deadbeat Attendant

When Deadbeat Attendant enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Bamboozling Beeble

Protection from Robots
{1}, {T}: The next time target player would roll one or more dice this turn, instead they roll that many dice plus one and you choose one of those rolls to ignore.

Animate Graveyard

Enchant your graveyard
Enchanted graveyard is a creature on the battlefield with base power and toughness each equal to the number of cards in it. It has the text boxes of all creature cards in it. It's still a graveyard.
If enchanted graveyard would leave the battlefield, instead exile Animate Graveyard.

Gleemax

You choose all targets for all spells and abilities.

Unlawful Entry

Target creature gets +1/+0 and gains flying until end of turn.
Whenever you put an art sticker on a creature, you may return Unlawful Entry from your graveyard to your hand.

Split Screen

When Split Screen enters, shuffle your library and deal it into four libraries. If anything refers to your library, choose one of your libraries for it.
Play with your libraries' top cards revealed.
When Split Screen leaves the battlefield, shuffle your libraries together.

Plate Spinning

Whenever you cast a spell, copy it and you may choose new targets for the copy. Then balance a card from outside the game on one of your fingertips. When that card falls or touches another card, sacrifice Plate Spinning.

Line Cutter

When Line Cutter enters, roll to visit your Attractions.

Paper Tiger

Creatures named Rock Lobster can't attack or block.

Wicker Picker

Creature spells you cast have sticker kicker {1}. (You may pay an additional {1} as you cast a creature spell. If you do, you get {TK}, then you may put a sticker on it.)

Phoebe, Head of S.N.E.A.K.

Phoebe, Head of S.N.E.A.K. can't be blocked by creatures with flavor text.
{2}{U}{B}: Phoebe permanently steals target creature's text box. (That creature loses all rules text, flavor text, and watermarks. This creature gains them.)

Saw in Half

Destroy target creature. If that creature dies this way, its controller creates two tokens that are copies of that creature, except their power is half that creature's power and their toughness is half that creature's toughness. Round up each time.

Have

Vedalken Squirrel-Whacker

As Vedalken Squirrel-Whacker enters, roll a six-sided die twice. Its base power becomes the first result and its base toughness becomes the second result.
If you would roll one or more six-sided dice, instead roll them and you may exchange one result with Vedalken Squirrel-Whacker's base power or base toughness.