Paper Tiger

Creatures named Rock Lobster can't attack or block.

Chicken à la King

Whenever a 6 is rolled on a six-sided die, put a +1/+1 counter on each Bird. (You may roll dice only when instructed to.)
Tap an untapped Bird you control: Roll a six-sided die. (Like now.)

Meandering River

This land enters tapped.
{T}: Add {W} or {U}.

Carnivorous Death-Parrot

Flying
At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice this creature unless you say its flavor text.

Common Courtesy

Whenever a player casts a spell without asking your permission while casting it, counter that spell.
When a player asks you permission to cast a spell and you refuse, counter that spell and sacrifice this enchantment.

Spy Eye

Flying
Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, you may draw a card from that player's library.

Rock Lobster

Creatures named Scissors Lizard can't attack or block.

Staying Power

"Until end of turn" and "this turn" effects don't end.

The Grey Havens

When The Grey Havens enters, scry 1.
{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add one mana of any color among legendary creature cards in your graveyard.

Look at Me, I'm the DCI

Ban a card other than a basic land card for the rest of the match. (All cards with that name in any zone or sideboard are removed from the match.)

Who // What // When // Where // Why

Defective Detective

This creature can't be blocked.
When this creature enters, a person outside the game looks at target opponent's hand and chooses a card from it. That player reveals that card.

Island

More or Less

Add or subtract 1 or one from a number or number word on target spell or permanent until end of turn.

Rings a Bell

As this enchantment enters, choose a word with four or more letters.
After you say the chosen word for the first time each turn, an opponent may ring or imitate a bell within five seconds. When no opponent does, draw a card.

Richard Garfield, Ph.D.

You may play cards as though they were other cards of your choice with the same mana cost. You can't choose the same card twice. (Mana cost includes color.)

Hidden Courtyard

This land enters tapped.
{T}: Add {W}.
{4}{W}, {T}, Sacrifice this land: Discover 4. Activate only as a sorcery. (Exile cards from the top of your library until you exile a nonland card with mana value 4 or less. Cast it without paying its mana cost or put it into your hand. Put the rest on the bottom in a random order.)

Underdome

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add one mana of any color. Spend this mana only to pay Un-costs.

Rules Lawyer

State-based actions don't apply to you or other permanents you control. (You don't lose the game due to having 0 or less life or drawing from an empty library. Your creatures aren't destroyed due to damage or deathtouch and aren't put into a graveyard due to having 0 or less toughness. Your planeswalkers aren't put into a graveyard if they have 0 loyalty. You don't put a legendary permanent into a graveyard if you control two with the same name. Counters aren't removed from your permanents due to game rules. Permanents you control attached or combined illegally remain on the battlefield. For complete rules and regulations, see rule 704.)

Tranquil Cove

This land enters tapped.
When this land enters, you gain 1 life.
{T}: Add {W} or {U}.

Topsy Turvy

The phases of each player's turn are reversed. (The phases are, in reverse order, ending, second main, combat, first main, and beginning.)
As long as there are more than two players in the game, the turn order is reversed.

Cavern of Souls

As this land enters, choose a creature type.
{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add one mana of any color. Spend this mana only to cast a creature spell of the chosen type, and that spell can't be countered.

Bamboozling Beeble

Protection from Robots
{1}, {T}: The next time target player would roll one or more dice this turn, instead they roll that many dice plus one and you choose one of those rolls to ignore.

Blurry Beeble

Blurry (This creature can be blocked only if defending player was wearing glasses as it was cast.)
Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, you may draw a card. If you do, discard a card.

Avatar of Me

This spell costs {1} more to cast for each ten years you've been alive.
Avatar of Me's power is equal to your height in feet and its toughness is equal to your American shoe size. Round to the nearest ½.
Avatar of Me is the color of your eyes.

Prince Imrahil the Fair

Whenever you draw your second card each turn, create a 1/1 white Human Soldier creature token.

Public Thoroughfare

This land enters tapped.
When this land enters, sacrifice it unless you tap an untapped artifact or land you control.
{T}: Add one mana of any color.

Meddling Kids

As this creature enters, choose a word with four or more letters.
Spells with the chosen word in their text box can't be cast.

Johnny, Combo Player

{4}: Search your library for a card, put that card into your hand, then shuffle.

Plaza of Heroes

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add one mana of any color. Spend this mana only to cast a legendary spell.
{T}: Add one mana of any color among legendary permanents you control.
{3}, {T}, Exile this land: Target legendary creature gains hexproof and indestructible until end of turn.

Cheatyface

If Cheatyface is in your hand, you may sneak Cheatyface onto the battlefield. If an opponent catches you right away, that player may exile Cheatyface.
Flying

Kasmina's Transmutation

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature loses all abilities and has base power and toughness 1/1.

Time Out

Roll a six-sided die. Put target nonland permanent into its owner's library just beneath the top X cards of that library, where X is the result.

Gingerbrute

Haste (This creature can attack and {T} as soon as it comes under your control.)
{1}: This creature can't be blocked this turn except by creatures with haste.
{2}, {T}, Sacrifice this creature: You gain 3 life.

Emcee

Whenever another creature enters, you may stand up and say in a deep, booming voice, "Presenting . . . " and that creature's name. If you do, put a +1/+1 counter on that creature.

Mobile Clone

Using a mobile device, take a picture of target creature. That device enters as a token that's a photocopy of the pictured creature. (Photocopies include Auras, Equipment, counters, and stickers in the shot. Don't touch other people's phones without permission and be careful if you do.)

Syr Cadian, Knight Owl

Knightlifelink (Damage dealt by Knights you control also causes you to gain that much life.)
{W}: Syr Cadian gains vigilance until end of turn. Activate only from sunrise to sunset.
{B}: Syr Cadian gains flying until end of turn. Activate only from sunset to sunrise.

Frankie Peanuts

At the beginning of your upkeep, you may ask target player a yes-or-no question. If you do, that player answers the question truthfully and abides by that answer if able until end of turn.

Kindslaver

{5}, {T}, Sacrifice Kindslaver: A person outside the game controls target player during that player's next turn. Neither player may advise that person until the end of that turn.

Everythingamajig

{1}: Flip a coin. If you win the flip, add {C}{C}. Activate only as an instant.
{3}, {T}: Target player discards a card. Activate only during your turn.
{X}: This artifact becomes an X/X Construct artifact creature until end of turn.

Totally Lost

Put target nonland permanent on top of its owner's library.

AWOL

Exile target attacking creature. Then remove it from the game. Then put it into the absolutely-removed-from-the-freaking-game-forever zone.

Water Gun Balloon Game

As this artifact enters, each player puts a pop! counter on "0."
Whenever a player casts a spell, move that player's pop! counter up one.
Whenever a player's pop! counter hits "5," that player creates a 5/5 pink Giant Teddy Bear creature token and resets all pop! counters to "0."

Spell Suck

Counter target spell, then assemble a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Pointy Finger of Doom

{3}, {T}: Spin this artifact in the middle of the table so that it rotates completely at least once, then destroy the closest permanent the finger points to.

B.O.B. (Bevy of Beebles)

As B.O.B. enters, create four 1/1 blue Beeble creature tokens.
The number of loyalty counters on B.O.B. is equal to the number of Beebles you control. (Create or sacrifice Beebles whenever B.O.B. gains or loses loyalty.)
+1: Up to X target Beebles can't be blocked this turn, where X is the number of cards in your hand.
−1: Draw a card.

Look at Me, I'm R&D

As this enchantment enters, choose a number and a second number one higher or one lower than the first number.
All instances of the first chosen number in the full text of each permanent, spell, and card in any zone are changed to the second chosen number.

Alexander Clamilton

Whenever you cast a wordy spell, scry 2. (A spell is wordy if it has four or more lines of rules text.)
{1}{R}, {T}: Choose target creature you don't control. Reveal the top card of your library. Alexander Clamilton gets +X/+0 until end of turn, where X is the number of lines of rules text of the revealed card. Alexander Clamilton fights that creature.

Sword of Dungeons & Dragons

Equipped creature gets +2/+2 and has protection from Rogues and from Clerics.
Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, create a 4/4 gold Dragon creature token with flying and roll a d20 (a twenty-sided die). If you roll a 20, repeat this process.
Equip {2}

Stamp of Approval

As this artifact enters, choose a watermark.
Creatures you control with the chosen watermark get +1/+1.

Azorius Guildgate

Animate Library

Enchant your library
Enchanted library is an artifact creature on the battlefield with power and toughness each equal to the number of cards in it. It's still a library.
If enchanted library would leave the battlefield, exile this Aura instead.

Jack-in-the-Mox

{T}: Roll a six-sided die. This ability has the indicated effect.
1 — Sacrifice this artifact and you lose 5 life.
2 — Add {W}.
3 — Add {U}.
4 — Add {B}.
5 — Add {R}.
6 — Add {G}.

Scissors Lizard

Creatures named Paper Tiger can't attack or block.

Flavor Judge

{T}: Choose target spell or ability that targets a permanent you control. Then ask a person outside the game if the story of what will happen makes sense. If they say no, sacrifice this creature and counter that spell or ability.

Five-Finger Discount

Put target nonland permanent into your hand. You may spend mana as though it were mana of any color the next time you cast that card.

Entirely Normal Armchair

During your turn, if this card is in your hand, you may hide it on the battlefield.
{0}: Return this artifact to its owner's hand. Only your opponents may activate this ability and only if they see this artifact.
{2}, Sacrifice this artifact: Destroy target attacking creature.

{2}, {T}: Move a counter from one permanent onto another. If the second permanent refers to any kind of counter, the moved counter becomes one of those counters. Otherwise, it becomes a +1/+1 counter.
{3}, {T}: Put a +1/+1 counter on target creature.
{4}, {T}: Proliferate. (Choose any number of permanents and/or players, then give each another counter of each kind already there.)

Captivating Cave

{T}: Add {C}.
{1}, {T}: Add one mana of any color.
{4}, {T}, Sacrifice this land: Put two +1/+1 counters on target creature. Activate only as a sorcery.

Old Guard

{W}, {T}: Tap target creature without reminder text. (Reminder text is still any italicized text in parentheses that explains rules you already know.)

Wall of Fortune

Defender
You may tap an untapped Wall you control to have any player reroll a die that player rolled.

Dwindle

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets -6/-0.
When enchanted creature blocks, destroy it. (The attacking creature remains blocked.)

Deep Freeze

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature has base power and toughness 0/4, has defender, loses all other abilities, and is a blue Wall in addition to its other colors and types.

Bronze Calendar

Spells you cast cost {1} less to cast.
You must speak in a voice other than your normal voice.
When you speak in your normal voice, sacrifice this artifact.

Wizard's Rockets

This artifact enters tapped.
{X}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Add X mana in any combination of colors.
When this artifact is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, draw a card.

GO TO JAIL

When this enchantment enters, exile target creature an opponent controls until this enchantment leaves the battlefield.
At the beginning of the upkeep of the exiled card's owner, that player rolls two six-sided dice. If they roll doubles, sacrifice this enchantment.

Knight of the Hokey Pokey

First strike
{1}{W}, Do the Hokey Pokey: Prevent all damage a source of your choice would deal to this creature this turn. (To do the Hokey Pokey, choose an arm, a leg, or your whole self and put it in. Put it out. Put it in. Shake it all about. You do the Hokey Pokey! Turn yourself around.)

Adorable Kitten

When this creature enters, roll a six-sided die. You gain life equal to the result.

Plains

Dramatic Reversal

Untap all nonland permanents you control.

Krark's Other Thumb

If you would roll a die, instead roll two of those dice and ignore one of those results.

Magic Word

Enchant creature
As this Aura enters, choose a word.
Whisper the chosen word: Tap enchanted creature.