406
3/24/2019
8 and half tails of my god you will hate me.
Deck Size: 100
Commander
Legal
Est deck cost: $418.84
Salt sum: 61.27
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406
3/24/2019
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Commander

Qty: 1 Price: $0.99
Eight-and-a-Half-Tails

{1}{W}: Target permanent you control gains protection from white until end of turn. {1}: Target spell or permanent becomes white until end of turn.

Creature
Eight-and-a-Half-Tails (chk) 8

Commander

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Land

Qty: 34 Price: $74.64
Arcane Lighthouse

{T}: Add {C}. {1}, {T}: Until end of turn, creatures your opponents control lose hexproof and shroud and can't have hexproof or shroud.

Land
Arcane Lighthouse (c14) 59
Command Tower

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Land
Command Tower (c17) 242
Detection Tower

{T}: Add {C}. {1}, {T}: Until end of turn, your opponents and creatures your opponents control with hexproof can be the targets of spells and abilities you control as though they didn't have hexproof.

Land
Detection Tower (m19) 249
Emeria, the Sky Ruin

This land enters tapped. At the beginning of your upkeep, if you control seven or more Plains, you may return target creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield. {T}: Add {W}.

Land
Emeria, the Sky Ruin (c14) 293
Glacial Chasm

Cumulative upkeep—Pay 2 life. (At the beginning of your upkeep, put an age counter on this permanent, then sacrifice it unless you pay its upkeep cost for each age counter on it.) When this land enters, sacrifice a land. Creatures you control can't attack. Prevent all damage that would be dealt to you.

Land
Glacial Chasm (ice) 353
Karoo

This land enters tapped. When this land enters, sacrifice it unless you return an untapped Plains you control to its owner's hand. {T}: Add {C}{W}.

Land
Karoo (c14) 303
New Benalia

This land enters tapped. When this land enters, scry 1. (Look at the top card of your library. You may put that card on the bottom.) {T}: Add {W}.

Land
New Benalia (c15) 295
Plains

({T}: Add {W}.)

Land
Plains (e01) 102
Secluded Steppe

This land enters tapped. {T}: Add {W}. Cycling {W} ({W}, Discard this card: Draw a card.)

Land
Secluded Steppe (cm2) 266
Temple of the False God

{T}: Add {C}{C}. Activate only if you control five or more lands.

Land
Temple of the False God (cm2) 272
Windbrisk Heights

Hideaway 4 (When this land enters, look at the top four cards of your library, exile one face down, then put the rest on the bottom in a random order.) This land enters tapped. {T}: Add {W}. {W}, {T}: You may play the exiled card without paying its mana cost if you attacked with three or more creatures this turn.

Land
Windbrisk Heights (md1) 18

Land

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Recursion

Qty: 2 Price: $3.68
Faith's Reward

Return to the battlefield all permanent cards in your graveyard that were put there from the battlefield this turn.

Instant
Faith's Reward (m13) 14
Open the Vaults

Return all artifact and enchantment cards from all graveyards to the battlefield under their owners' control. (Auras with nothing to enchant remain in graveyards.)

Sorcery
Open the Vaults (c15) 77

Recursion

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Land Destruction

Qty: 1 Price: $0.49
Fall of the Thran

(As this Saga enters and after your draw step, add a lore counter. Sacrifice after III.) I — Destroy all lands. II, III — Each player returns two land cards from their graveyard to the battlefield.

Enchantment
Fall of the Thran (dom) 18

Land Destruction

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Removal

Qty: 13 Price: $32.15
Aura of Silence

Artifact and enchantment spells your opponents cast cost {2} more to cast. Sacrifice this enchantment: Destroy target artifact or enchantment.

Enchantment
Aura of Silence (c15) 60
Citywide Bust

Destroy all creatures with toughness 4 or greater.

Sorcery
Citywide Bust (grn) 4
Condemn

Put target attacking creature on the bottom of its owner's library. Its controller gains life equal to its toughness.

Instant
Condemn (m11) 11
Dusk

Sorcery
Dusk // Dawn (akh) 210
Glare of Heresy

Exile target white permanent.

Sorcery
Glare of Heresy (ths) 15
Harsh Mercy

Each player chooses a creature type. Destroy all creatures that aren't of a type chosen this way. They can't be regenerated.

Sorcery
Harsh Mercy (ons) 39
Hour of Revelation

This spell costs {3} less to cast if there are ten or more nonland permanents on the battlefield. Destroy all nonland permanents.

Sorcery
Hour of Revelation (hou) 15
Overwhelming Splendor

Enchant player Creatures enchanted player controls lose all abilities and have base power and toughness 1/1. Enchanted player can't activate abilities that aren't mana abilities or loyalty abilities.

Enchantment
Overwhelming Splendor (hou) 19
Restore Balance

Suspend 6—{W} Each player chooses a number of lands they control equal to the number of lands controlled by the player who controls the fewest, then sacrifices the rest. Players sacrifice creatures and discard cards the same way.

Sorcery
Restore Balance (tsp) 38
Rout

You may cast this spell as though it had flash if you pay {2} more to cast it. (You may cast it any time you could cast an instant.) Destroy all creatures. They can't be regenerated.

Sorcery
Rout (c17) 71
Silverchase Fox

{1}{W}, Sacrifice this creature: Exile target enchantment.

Creature
Silverchase Fox (bbd) 106
Swords to Plowshares

Exile target creature. Its controller gains life equal to its power.

Instant
Swords to Plowshares (a25) 35
Wrath of God

Destroy all creatures. They can't be regenerated.

Sorcery
Wrath of God (c13) 27

Removal

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Counters

Qty: 1 Price: $2.99
Sensei Golden-Tail

Bushido 1 (Whenever this creature blocks or becomes blocked, it gets +1/+1 until end of turn.) {1}{W}, {T}: Put a training counter on target creature. That creature gains bushido 1 and becomes a Samurai in addition to its other creature types. Activate only as a sorcery.

Creature
Sensei Golden-Tail (chk) 44

Counters

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Lifegain

Qty: 2 Price: $11.34
Authority of the Consuls

Creatures your opponents control enter tapped. Whenever a creature an opponent controls enters, you gain 1 life.

Enchantment
Authority of the Consuls (kld) 5
Pious Kitsune

At the beginning of your upkeep, put a devotion counter on this creature. Then if a creature named Eight-and-a-Half-Tails is on the battlefield, you gain 1 life for each devotion counter on this creature. {T}, Remove a devotion counter from this creature: You gain 1 life.

Creature
Pious Kitsune (chk) 38

Lifegain

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Stax

Qty: 10 Price: $60.50
Blind Obedience

Extort (Whenever you cast a spell, you may pay {W/B}. If you do, each opponent loses 1 life and you gain that much life.) Artifacts and creatures your opponents control enter tapped.

Enchantment
Blind Obedience (c17) 57
Crackdown

Nonwhite creatures with power 3 or greater don't untap during their controllers' untap steps.

Enchantment
Crackdown (mmq) 15
Damping Sphere

If a land is tapped for two or more mana, it produces {C} instead of any other type and amount. Each spell a player casts costs {1} more to cast for each other spell that player has cast this turn.

Artifact
Damping Sphere (dom) 213
Defense Grid

Each spell costs {3} more to cast except during its controller's turn.

Artifact
Defense Grid (9ed) 293
Equipoise

At the beginning of your upkeep, for each land target player controls in excess of the number you control, choose a land that player controls, then the chosen permanents phase out. Repeat this process for artifacts and creatures. (While they're phased out, they're treated as though they don't exist. They phase in before that player untaps during their next untap step.)

Enchantment
Equipoise (vis) 3
Rule of Law

Each player can't cast more than one spell each turn.

Enchantment
Rule of Law (10e) 37
Samurai of the Pale Curtain

Bushido 1 (Whenever this creature blocks or becomes blocked, it gets +1/+1 until end of turn.) If a permanent would be put into a graveyard, exile it instead.

Creature
Samurai of the Pale Curtain (chk) 43
Solemnity

Players can't get counters. Counters can't be put on artifacts, creatures, enchantments, or lands.

Enchantment
Solemnity (hou) 22
Torpor Orb

Creatures entering don't cause abilities to trigger.

Artifact
Torpor Orb (nph) 162
Ward of Bones

Each opponent who controls more creatures than you can't cast creature spells. The same is true for artifacts and enchantments. Each opponent who controls more lands than you can't play lands.

Artifact
Ward of Bones (eve) 174

Stax

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Creature

Qty: 5 Price: $1.75
Filigree Familiar

When this creature enters, you gain 2 life. When this creature dies, draw a card.

Creature Artifact
Filigree Familiar (gnt) 52
Kitsune Blademaster

First strike Bushido 1 (Whenever this creature blocks or becomes blocked, it gets +1/+1 until end of turn.)

Creature
Kitsune Blademaster (chk) 25
Kitsune Bonesetter

{T}: Prevent the next 3 damage that would be dealt to target creature this turn. Activate only if you have more cards in hand than each opponent.

Creature
Kitsune Bonesetter (sok) 15
Kitsune Palliator

{T}: Prevent the next 1 damage that would be dealt to each creature and each player this turn.

Creature
Kitsune Palliator (bok) 14
Split-Tail Miko

{W}, {T}: Prevent the next 2 damage that would be dealt to any target this turn.

Creature
Split-Tail Miko (bok) 23

Creature

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Protection

Qty: 19 Price: $72.93
Brave the Sands

Creatures you control have vigilance. Each creature you control can block an additional creature each combat.

Enchantment
Brave the Sands (cm2) 19
Chronomantic Escape

Until your next turn, creatures can't attack you. Exile Chronomantic Escape with three time counters on it. Suspend 3—{2}{W} (Rather than cast this card from your hand, you may pay {2}{W} and exile it with three time counters on it. At the beginning of your upkeep, remove a time counter. When the last is removed, you may cast it without paying its mana cost.)

Sorcery
Chronomantic Escape (fut) 4
Comeuppance

Prevent all damage that would be dealt to you and planeswalkers you control this turn by sources you don't control. If damage from a creature source is prevented this way, Comeuppance deals that much damage to that creature. If damage from a noncreature source is prevented this way, Comeuppance deals that much damage to the source's controller.

Instant
Comeuppance (c14) 4
Crawlspace

No more than two creatures can attack you each combat.

Artifact
Crawlspace (c13) 240
Divine Presence

If a source would deal 4 or more damage to a permanent or player, that source deals 3 damage to that permanent or player instead.

Enchantment
Divine Presence (inv) 15
Earnest Fellowship

Each creature has protection from its colors.

Enchantment
Earnest Fellowship (ody) 21
Fight or Flight

At the beginning of combat on each opponent's turn, separate all creatures that player controls into two piles. Only creatures in the pile of their choice can attack this turn.

Enchantment
Fight or Flight (inv) 16
Ghostly Prison

Creatures can't attack you unless their controller pays {2} for each creature they control that's attacking you.

Enchantment
Ghostly Prison (pc2) 7
Ivory Mask

You have shroud. (You can't be the target of spells or abilities.)

Enchantment
Ivory Mask (8ed) 27
Karmic Justice

Whenever a spell or ability an opponent controls destroys a noncreature permanent you control, you may destroy target permanent that opponent controls.

Enchantment
Karmic Justice (c15) 72
Kitsune Healer

{T}: Prevent the next 1 damage that would be dealt to any target this turn. {T}: Prevent all damage that would be dealt to target legendary creature this turn.

Creature
Kitsune Healer (chk) 27
Lightmine Field

Whenever one or more creatures attack, this enchantment deals damage to each of those creatures equal to the number of attacking creatures.

Enchantment
Lightmine Field (roe) 32
Norn's Annex

({W/P} can be paid with either {W} or 2 life.) Creatures can't attack you or planeswalkers you control unless their controller pays {W/P} for each of those creatures.

Artifact
Norn's Annex (nph) 17
Opal-Eye, Konda's Yojimbo

Defender (This creature can't attack.) Bushido 1 (Whenever this creature blocks or becomes blocked, it gets +1/+1 until end of turn.) {T}: The next time a source of your choice would deal damage this turn, that damage is dealt to Opal-Eye instead. {1}{W}: Prevent the next 1 damage that would be dealt to Opal-Eye this turn.

Creature
Opal-Eye, Konda's Yojimbo (bok) 17
Orbs of Warding

You have hexproof. (You can't be the target of spells or abilities your opponents control.) If a creature would deal damage to you, prevent 1 of that damage.

Artifact
Orbs of Warding (ori) 234
Rune of Protection: White

{W}: The next time a white source of your choice would deal damage to you this turn, prevent that damage. Cycling {2} ({2}, Discard this card: Draw a card.)

Enchantment
Rune of Protection: White (usg) 41
Rune-Tail, Kitsune Ascendant

Creature
Rune-Tail, Kitsune Ascendant // Rune-Tail's Essence (sok) 27
Silence

Your opponents can't cast spells this turn.

Instant
Silence (m10) 31
Sphere of Safety

Creatures can't attack you or planeswalkers you control unless their controller pays {X} for each of those creatures, where X is the number of enchantments you control.

Enchantment
Sphere of Safety (c16) 77

Protection

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Tutor

Qty: 1 Price: $39.99
Enlightened Tutor

Search your library for an artifact or enchantment card, reveal it, then shuffle and put that card on top.

Instant
Enlightened Tutor (mir) 14

Tutor

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Finisher

Qty: 3 Price: $8.77
Approach of the Second Sun

If this spell was cast from your hand and you've cast another spell named Approach of the Second Sun this game, you win the game. Otherwise, put Approach of the Second Sun into its owner's library seventh from the top and you gain 7 life.

Sorcery
Approach of the Second Sun (akh) 4
Celestial Convergence

This enchantment enters with seven omen counters on it. At the beginning of your upkeep, remove an omen counter from this enchantment. If there are no omen counters on this enchantment, the player with the highest life total wins the game. If two or more players are tied for highest life total, the game is a draw.

Enchantment
Celestial Convergence (pcy) 5
Near-Death Experience

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you have exactly 1 life, you win the game.

Enchantment
Near-Death Experience (v16) 10

Finisher

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Ramp

Qty: 7 Price: $104.13
Land Tax

At the beginning of your upkeep, if an opponent controls more lands than you, you may search your library for up to three basic land cards, reveal them, put them into your hand, then shuffle.

Enchantment
Land Tax (4ed) 34
Pearl Medallion

White spells you cast cost {1} less to cast.

Artifact
Pearl Medallion (c14) 260
Pyramid of the Pantheon

{2}, {T}: Add one mana of any color. Put a brick counter on this artifact. {T}: Add three mana of any one color. Activate only if there are three or more brick counters on this artifact.

Artifact
Pyramid of the Pantheon (akh) 235
Smothering Tithe

Whenever an opponent draws a card, that player may pay {2}. If the player doesn't, you create a Treasure token. (It's an artifact with "{T}, Sacrifice this token: Add one mana of any color.")

Enchantment
Smothering Tithe (rna) 22
Sol Ring

{T}: Add {C}{C}.

Artifact
Sol Ring (cmd) 261
Sword of the Animist

Equipped creature gets +1/+1. Whenever equipped creature attacks, you may search your library for a basic land card, put it onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle. Equip {2}

Artifact
Sword of the Animist (e01) 89
Worn Powerstone

This artifact enters tapped. {T}: Add {C}{C}.

Artifact
Worn Powerstone (c15) 275

Ramp

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Deck Info

Deck stats

74 pips - 53 cards
35 mana - 32 cards
0 pips - 0 cards
0 mana - 3 cards
0 pips - 0 cards
0 mana - 3 cards
0 pips - 0 cards
0 mana - 3 cards
0 pips - 0 cards
0 mana - 3 cards
0 pips - 0 cards
9 mana - 6 cards
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Description

{"ops":[{"insert":"This deck is single handily the most fun deck I have ever created. It is so annoying that it currently has most of my magic group suggesting cards to ruin my fun. If lucky enough you can become immortal, and things like near death experience actually work really well when you can control the damage you take. \n\nWhen creating this deck I had only one goal, how the hell do you make the worst colour in EDH, mono and effective. Answer, instead of trying to keep up with everyone, simply slow them down so you don't have to keep up. This deck can grind some decks to a complete stand still. The major downside of this deck, is it does invite people to gang up on you, which is just rude!\n\nThere are some fun combos to be had as well, like Solemnity + Glacial Chasm, or crawlspace plus fight or flight. The only question people have during a game with this deck is, \"so I got rid of one horrible enchantment or artifact what horrible thing is next\".\n"}]}
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