Guff Rewrites History

For each player, choose target nonenchantment, nonland permanent that player controls. Those permanents' owners shuffle them into their libraries. Each player who controlled one of those permanents exiles cards from the top of their library until they exile a nonland card, then puts the rest on the bottom of their library in a random order. Each player may cast the nonland card they exiled without paying its mana cost.

Implement of Combustion

{R}, Sacrifice Implement of Combustion: It deals 1 damage to target player or planeswalker.
When Implement of Combustion is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, draw a card.

Basilisk Collar

Equipped creature has deathtouch and lifelink. (Any amount of damage it deals to a creature is enough to destroy it. Damage dealt by this creature also causes you to gain that much life.)
Equip {2} ({2}: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.)

Mishra's Bauble

{T}, Sacrifice Mishra's Bauble: Look at the top card of target player's library. Draw a card at the beginning of the next turn's upkeep.

Talisman of Conviction

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {R} or {W}. Talisman of Conviction deals 1 damage to you.

Sting, the Glinting Dagger

Equipped creature gets +1/+1 and has haste.
At the beginning of each combat, untap equipped creature.
Equipped creature has first strike as long as it's blocking or blocked by a Goblin or Orc.
Equip {2}

Prized Statue

When Prized Statue enters or is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, create a Treasure token. (It's an artifact with "{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color.")

Bjorna, Nightfall Alchemist

{T}, Sacrifice an artifact: Bjorna, Nightfall Alchemist deals 1 damage to target creature. Goad that creature. (Until your next turn, that creature attacks each combat if able and attacks a player other than you if able.)
Friends forever (You can have two commanders if both have friends forever.)

Dispeller's Capsule

{2}{W}, {T}, Sacrifice Dispeller's Capsule: Destroy target artifact or enchantment.

Executioner's Capsule

{1}{B}, {T}, Sacrifice Executioner's Capsule: Destroy target nonblack creature.

Mistvault Bridge

Mistvault Bridge enters tapped.
Indestructible
{T}: Add {U} or {B}.

Seachrome Coast

Seachrome Coast enters tapped unless you control two or fewer other lands.
{T}: Add {W} or {U}.

Weathered Wayfarer

{W}, {T}: Search your library for a land card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle. Activate only if an opponent controls more lands than you.

Mephitic Draught

When Mephitic Draught enters or is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, you draw a card and you lose 1 life.

Reckless Fireweaver

Whenever an artifact you control enters, Reckless Fireweaver deals 1 damage to each opponent.

Sage of Lat-Nam

Shivan Reef

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {U} or {R}. Shivan Reef deals 1 damage to you.

Dusk Rose Reliquary

As an additional cost to cast this spell, sacrifice an artifact or creature.
Ward {2}
When Dusk Rose Reliquary enters, exile target artifact or creature an opponent controls until Dusk Rose Reliquary leaves the battlefield.

Baleful Strix

Flying, deathtouch
When Baleful Strix enters, draw a card.

Talisman of Creativity

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {U} or {R}. Talisman of Creativity deals 1 damage to you.

Voyager Staff

{2}, Sacrifice Voyager Staff: Exile target creature. Return the exiled card to the battlefield under its owner's control at the beginning of the next end step.

Skrelv's Hive

At the beginning of your upkeep, you lose 1 life and create a 1/1 colorless Phyrexian Mite artifact creature token with toxic 1 and "This creature can't block."
Corrupted — As long as an opponent has three or more poison counters, creatures you control with toxic have lifelink.

Food Fight

Artifacts you control have "{2}, Sacrifice this artifact: It deals damage to any target equal to 1 plus the number of permanents named Food Fight you control."

Battlefield Forge

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {R} or {W}. Battlefield Forge deals 1 damage to you.

Oni-Cult Anvil

Whenever one or more artifacts you control leave the battlefield during your turn, create a 1/1 colorless Construct artifact creature token. This ability triggers only once each turn.
{T}, Sacrifice an artifact: Oni-Cult Anvil deals 1 damage to each opponent. You gain 1 life.

Virus Beetle

When Virus Beetle enters, each opponent discards a card.

Island

Path of Ancestry

Path of Ancestry enters tapped.
{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity. When that mana is spent to cast a creature spell that shares a creature type with your commander, scry 1. (Look at the top card of your library. You may put that card on the bottom.)

Cathar Commando

Flash (You may cast this spell any time you could cast an instant.)
{1}, Sacrifice this creature: Destroy target artifact or enchantment.

Goblin Engineer

When Goblin Engineer enters, you may search your library for an artifact card, put it into your graveyard, then shuffle.
{R}, {T}, Sacrifice an artifact: Return target artifact card with mana value 3 or less from your graveyard to the battlefield.

Exotic Orchard

{T}: Add one mana of any color that a land an opponent controls could produce.

Ichor Wellspring

When Ichor Wellspring enters or is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, draw a card.

Oswald Fiddlebender

Magical Tinkering — {W}, {T}, Sacrifice an artifact: Search your library for an artifact card with mana value equal to 1 plus the sacrificed artifact's mana value, put it onto the battlefield, then shuffle. Activate only as a sorcery.

Skullclamp

Equipped creature gets +1/-1.
Whenever equipped creature dies, draw two cards.
Equip {1}

Talisman of Progress

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {W} or {U}. Talisman of Progress deals 1 damage to you.

Unearth

Return target creature card with mana value 3 or less from your graveyard to the battlefield.
Cycling {2} ({2}, Discard this card: Draw a card.)

Sol Ring

Vault of Whispers

Wishclaw Talisman

This artifact enters with three wish counters on it.
{1}, {T}, Remove a wish counter from this artifact: Search your library for a card, put it into your hand, then shuffle. An opponent gains control of this artifact. Activate only during your turn.

Wizard's Rockets

Wizard's Rockets enters tapped.
{X}, {T}, Sacrifice Wizard's Rockets: Add X mana in any combination of colors.
When Wizard's Rockets is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, draw a card.

Wayfarer's Bauble

{2}, {T}, Sacrifice Wayfarer's Bauble: Search your library for a basic land card, put that card onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle.

Caves of Koilos

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {W} or {B}. Caves of Koilos deals 1 damage to you.

Riddlesmith

Whenever you cast an artifact spell, you may draw a card. If you do, discard a card.

Ornithopter of Paradise

Third Path Iconoclast

Whenever you cast a noncreature spell, create a 1/1 colorless Soldier artifact creature token.

Experimental Synthesizer

When Experimental Synthesizer enters or leaves the battlefield, exile the top card of your library. Until end of turn, you may play that card.
{2}{R}, Sacrifice Experimental Synthesizer: Create a 2/2 white Samurai creature token with vigilance. Activate only as a sorcery.

Benevolent Bodyguard

Sacrifice Benevolent Bodyguard: Target creature you control gains protection from the color of your choice until end of turn.

Bladewheel Chariot

Tap two other untapped artifacts you control: Bladewheel Chariot becomes an artifact creature until end of turn.
Crew 1 (Tap any number of creatures you control with total power 1 or more: This Vehicle becomes an artifact creature until end of turn.)

Spring-Loaded Sawblades

Flash
When Spring-Loaded Sawblades enters, it deals 5 damage to target tapped creature an opponent controls.
Craft with artifact {3}{W} ({3}{W}, Exile this artifact, Exile another artifact you control or an artifact card from your graveyard: Return this card transformed under its owner's control. Craft only as a sorcery.)

Spring-Loaded Sawblades // Bladewheel Chariot

Sulfurous Springs

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {B} or {R}. Sulfurous Springs deals 1 damage to you.

Underground River

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {U} or {B}. Underground River deals 1 damage to you.

Last One Standing

Choose a creature at random, then destroy the rest.

Wernog, Rider's Chaplain

When Wernog, Rider's Chaplain enters or leaves the battlefield, each opponent may investigate. Each opponent who doesn't loses 1 life. You investigate X times, where X is one plus the number of opponents who investigated this way.
Friends forever (You can have two commanders if both have friends forever.)

Rustvale Bridge

Rustvale Bridge enters tapped.
Indestructible
{T}: Add {R} or {W}.

Concealed Courtyard

Concealed Courtyard enters tapped unless you control two or fewer other lands.
{T}: Add {W} or {B}.

Adarkar Wastes

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {W} or {U}. Adarkar Wastes deals 1 damage to you.

Consuming Sepulcher

At the beginning of your upkeep, each opponent loses 1 life and you gain 1 life.

Tithing Blade

When Tithing Blade enters, each opponent sacrifices a creature of their choice.
Craft with creature {4}{B} ({4}{B}, Exile this artifact, Exile a creature you control or a creature card from your graveyard: Return this card transformed under its owner's control. Craft only as a sorcery.)

Tithing Blade // Consuming Sepulcher

Great Furnace

Terrarion

Terrarion enters tapped.
{2}, {T}, Sacrifice Terrarion: Add two mana in any combination of colors.
When Terrarion is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, draw a card.

Nimblewright Schematic

When Nimblewright Schematic enters or is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, create a 1/1 colorless Construct artifact creature token.

Servo Schematic

When Servo Schematic enters or is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, create a 1/1 colorless Servo artifact creature token.

Silverbluff Bridge

Silverbluff Bridge enters tapped.
Indestructible
{T}: Add {U} or {R}.

Lotho, Corrupt Shirriff

Whenever a player casts their second spell each turn, you lose 1 life and create a Treasure token. (It's an artifact with "{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color.")

Blackcleave Cliffs

Blackcleave Cliffs enters tapped unless you control two or fewer other lands.
{T}: Add {B} or {R}.

Vanquish the Horde

This spell costs {1} less to cast for each creature on the battlefield.
Destroy all creatures.

Command Tower

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Loyal Apprentice

Haste
Lieutenant — At the beginning of combat on your turn, if you control your commander, create a 1/1 colorless Thopter artifact creature token with flying. That token gains haste until end of turn.

Syr Ginger, the Meal Ender

Syr Ginger, the Meal Ender has trample, hexproof, and haste as long as an opponent controls a planeswalker.
Whenever another artifact you control is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, put a +1/+1 counter on Syr Ginger and scry 1.
{2}, {T}, Sacrifice Syr Ginger: You gain life equal to its power.

Blasphemous Act

This spell costs {1} less to cast for each creature on the battlefield.
Blasphemous Act deals 13 damage to each creature.

Darkslick Shores

Darkslick Shores enters tapped unless you control two or fewer other lands.
{T}: Add {U} or {B}.

Drossforge Bridge

Drossforge Bridge enters tapped.
Indestructible
{T}: Add {B} or {R}.

Sevinne's Reclamation

Return target permanent card with mana value 3 or less from your graveyard to the battlefield. If this spell was cast from a graveyard, you may copy this spell and may choose a new target for the copy.
Flashback {4}{W} (You may cast this card from your graveyard for its flashback cost. Then exile it.)

The Reality Chip

You may look at the top card of your library any time.
As long as The Reality Chip is attached to a creature, you may play lands and cast spells from the top of your library.
Reconfigure {2}{U} ({2}{U}: Attach to target creature you control; or unattach from a creature. Reconfigure only as a sorcery. While attached, this isn't a creature.)

Talisman of Dominance

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {U} or {B}. Talisman of Dominance deals 1 damage to you.

Mountain

Chronomancer

Flying
Atomic Transmutation — {1}, {T}, Sacrifice another artifact: Draw a card.
Unearth {2}{B} ({2}{B}: Return this card from your graveyard to the battlefield. It gains haste. Exile it at the beginning of the next end step or if it would leave the battlefield. Unearth only as a sorcery.)

Ancient Den

Soul Shatter

Each opponent sacrifices a creature or planeswalker with the highest mana value among creatures and planeswalkers they control.

Skrelv, Defector Mite

Toxic 1 (Players dealt combat damage by this creature also get a poison counter.)
Skrelv, Defector Mite can't block.
{W/P}, {T}: Choose a color. Another target creature you control gains toxic 1 and hexproof from that color until end of turn. It can't be blocked by creatures of that color this turn. ({W/P} can be paid with either {W} or 2 life.)

Fellwar Stone

Talisman of Hierarchy

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {W} or {B}. Talisman of Hierarchy deals 1 damage to you.

Myr Retriever

When Myr Retriever dies, return another target artifact card from your graveyard to your hand.

Arcane Signet

Razortide Bridge

Razortide Bridge enters tapped.
Indestructible
{T}: Add {W} or {U}.

Disciple of the Vault

Whenever an artifact is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, you may have target opponent lose 1 life.

Glimmervoid

At the beginning of the end step, if you control no artifacts, sacrifice Glimmervoid.
{T}: Add one mana of any color.

Underhanded Designs

Whenever an artifact you control enters, you may pay {1}. If you do, each opponent loses 1 life and you gain 1 life.
{1}{B}, Sacrifice Underhanded Designs: Destroy target creature. Activate only if you control two or more artifacts.

Swamp

Chromatic Star

{1}, {T}, Sacrifice Chromatic Star: Add one mana of any color.
When Chromatic Star is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, draw a card.

Perilous Myr

When Perilous Myr dies, it deals 2 damage to any target.

Goldmire Bridge

Goldmire Bridge enters tapped.
Indestructible
{T}: Add {W} or {B}.

Mother of Runes

{T}: Target creature you control gains protection from the color of your choice until end of turn.

Seat of the Synod

Lurrus of the Dream-Den

Companion — Each permanent card in your starting deck has mana value 2 or less. (If this card is your chosen companion, you may put it into your hand from outside the game for {3} as a sorcery.)
Lifelink
Once during each of your turns, you may cast a permanent spell with mana value 2 or less from your graveyard.

Implement of Improvement

{W}, Sacrifice Implement of Improvement: You gain 2 life.
When Implement of Improvement is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, draw a card.

Eye of Vecna

When Eye of Vecna enters, you draw a card and you lose 2 life.
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may pay {2}. If you do, you draw a card and you lose 2 life.

Plains

Spire of Industry

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}, Pay 1 life: Add one mana of any color. Activate only if you control an artifact.

Hangarback Walker

Hangarback Walker enters with X +1/+1 counters on it.
When Hangarback Walker dies, create a 1/1 colorless Thopter artifact creature token with flying for each +1/+1 counter on Hangarback Walker.
{1}, {T}: Put a +1/+1 counter on Hangarback Walker.

Mystic Remora

Cumulative upkeep {1} (At the beginning of your upkeep, put an age counter on this permanent, then sacrifice it unless you pay its upkeep cost for each age counter on it.)
Whenever an opponent casts a noncreature spell, you may draw a card unless that player pays {4}.

Idol of Oblivion

{T}: Draw a card. Activate only if you created a token this turn.
{8}, {T}, Sacrifice Idol of Oblivion: Create a 10/10 colorless Eldrazi creature token.

Tome of Legends

Tome of Legends enters with a page counter on it.
Whenever your commander enters or attacks, put a page counter on Tome of Legends.
{1}, {T}, Remove a page counter from Tome of Legends: Draw a card.