Prize Pig

Whenever you gain life, put that many ribbon counters on Prize Pig. Then if there are three or more ribbon counters on Prize Pig, remove those counters and untap it.
{T}: Add one mana of any color.

Chivalrous Chevalier

Flying
When Chivalrous Chevalier enters, return a creature you control to its owner's hand unless you compliment an opponent.

Urza's Fun House

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {∞}. Activate only once and only if you control an Urza's Mine, an Urza's Power-Plant, and an Urza's Tower.
{7}, {T}: Head to AskUrza.com and click Urza's Fun House.

Boing!

Return target creature to its owner's hand, then roll a six-sided die. If the result is 3 or less, scry a number of cards equal to the result.

Pie-Eating Contest

As an additional cost to cast this spell, gobble X. (Each time you gobble, take a bite of food or sacrifice a Food token.)
X target creatures you control each get +2/+2 and gain trample until end of turn.

Complaints Clerk

When Complaints Clerk enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)
Whenever you roll a 1, create a 1/1 white Clown Robot artifact creature token.

Vedalken Squirrel-Whacker

As Vedalken Squirrel-Whacker enters, roll a six-sided die twice. Its base power becomes the first result and its base toughness becomes the second result.
If you would roll one or more six-sided dice, instead roll them and you may exchange one result with Vedalken Squirrel-Whacker's base power or base toughness.

Spelling Bee

Flying, deathtouch
Whenever Spelling Bee deals combat damage to a player, that player looks at the top card of your library and chooses a word on that card. You spell that word. If you spell it correctly, draw a card. Otherwise, scry 1.

Park Map

{1}, Sacrifice Park Map: Search your library for a land card that doesn't have the same art as a permanent you control, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Rapacious Guest

Menace
Whenever one or more creatures you control deal combat damage to a player, create a Food token.
Whenever you sacrifice a Food, put a +1/+1 counter on Rapacious Guest.
When Rapacious Guest leaves the battlefield, target opponent loses life equal to its power.

Pie-roclasm

Pie-roclasm deals π damage to each non-Clown creature. (How to calculate π isn't important. It's a smidgen more than 3.)

Omniclown Colossus

Affinity for Clowns (This spell costs {1} less to cast for each Clown you control.)
Trample

Omniclown Colossus // Pie-roclasm

Sophina, Spearsage Deserter

Menace
Whenever Sophina, Spearsage Deserter attacks, investigate once for each nontoken attacking creature. (To investigate, create a Clue token. It's an artifact with "{2}, Sacrifice this artifact: Draw a card.")
Friends forever (You can have two commanders if both have friends forever.)

Many Partings

Search your library for a basic land card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle. Create a Food token. (It's an artifact with "{2}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.")

Spinnerette, Arachnobat

Reach
When Spinnerette, Arachnobat enters, open an Attraction.
As long as you control three or more Attractions, Spinnerette gets +2/+0 and has menace.

A Real Handful

As long as one or more hands are touching A Real Handful, it gets +2/+2.
As long as two or more hands are touching A Real Handful, it has menace.
As long as three or more hands are touching A Real Handful, it has lifelink.

Six-Sided Die

Choose target creature. Roll a six-sided die.
1 — It has base toughness 1 until end of turn.
2 — Put two -1/-1 counters on it.
3 — Six-Sided Die deals 3 damage to it and you gain 3 life.
4 — It gets -4/-4 until end of turn.
5 — Destroy it.
6 — Exile it.

Surprise Party

When Surprise Party enters, yell "Surprise!" and put onto the battlefield any number of printed Clown Robot tokens that aren't touching each other, that you hid on the battlefield before you cast Surprise Party, and that weren't spotted by an opponent before you cast Surprise Party.
Robots you control get +1/+0 and have vigilance.

Main Event Horizon

As an additional cost to cast this spell, choose A through M or N through Z.
Destroy each creature whose name begins with a letter in the chosen range.

Non-Human Cannonball

When Non-Human Cannonball dies, roll a six-sided die. If the result is 4 or less, Non-Human Cannonball deals that much damage to you.

Memory Test

When Memory Test enters, target opponent exiles cards from the bottom of their library until they exile five nonland cards, then turns those nonland cards face down.
Visit — Name the exiled face-down cards, then look at them. If you named them correctly, turn them face up, then claim the prize!
Prize — Create three 1/1 red Balloon creature tokens with flying, then sacrifice Memory Test and open an Attraction.

Saruman's Trickery

Counter target spell.
Amass Orcs 1. (Put a +1/+1 counter on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.)

Trigger Happy

Choose a triggered ability of target permanent. It triggers. You control that ability.

"Lifetime" Pass Holder

"Lifetime" Pass Holder enters tapped.
When "Lifetime" Pass Holder dies, open an Attraction.
Whenever you roll to visit your Attractions, if you roll a 6, you may return "Lifetime" Pass Holder from your graveyard to the battlefield.

Fear, Fire, Foes!

Damage can't be prevented this turn. Fear, Fire, Foes! deals X damage to target creature and 1 damage to each other creature with the same controller.

Standard Procedure

{1}, Reveal Standard Procedure from your hand: Choose an instant or sorcery card with mana value 3 or less currently legal in the Standard format. Standard Procedure becomes that card until end of turn.

Chipper Chopper

Flying
When Chipper Chopper enters, you may sacrifice another artifact. If you do, put two +1/+1 counters on Chipper Chopper and it assembles a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Claire D'Loon, Joy Sculptor

When Claire D'Loon, Joy Sculptor enters, for the rest of the game, tokens you own become cards that are still tokens. (They continue to exist after they leave the battlefield.)
{1}{W}{U}, {T}: You may put a token from your graveyard or hand onto the battlefield.

Night Shift of the Living Dead

After you roll a die, you may pay 1 life. If you do, increase or decrease the result by 1. Do this only once each turn.
Whenever you roll a 6, create a 2/2 black Zombie Employee creature token.

Push Your Luck

Visit — Reveal cards from the top of your library until you decide to stop. If the total mana value of the cards revealed this way is 7 or less, create a 2/2 pink Teddy Bear creature token. If the total is exactly 7, claim the prize! Shuffle the revealed cards into your library.
Prize — Put five +1/+1 counters on a Teddy Bear you control. It gains haste. Sacrifice Push Your Luck and open an Attraction.

Deadbeat Attendant

When Deadbeat Attendant enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Goblin Girder Gang

Reach
Whenever you roll a die, if the result isn't stored on Goblin Girder Gang, you may store that result on it. When you do, Goblin Girder Gang deals 1 damage to any target without a hat.
Goblin Girder Gang gets +1/+0 for each result stored on it.

Draconian Gate-Bot

When Draconian Gate-Bot enters, choose one —
• Open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)
• Destroy target Attraction. (It's put into its owner's junkyard.)

Ticking Mime Bomb

When Ticking Mime Bomb enters, without speaking or indicating any specific creature, pantomime to a person outside the game, then they choose a creature you don't control. Ticking Mime Bomb deals damage equal to twice the number of Robots you control to the chosen creature.

Westfold Rider

Sacrifice Westfold Rider: Destroy target artifact or enchantment. Activate only as a sorcery.

Priority Boarding

Whenever you roll a die, you may reveal the top card of your library. Do this only once each turn. Whenever you reveal a card with mana value less than the result this way, you may exile it. If you do, you may play it this turn.

Dee Kay, Finder of the Lost

When Dee Kay, Finder of the Lost enters, open an Attraction.
Whenever you roll a 2, each opponent loses 1 life and you gain 1 life.
Whenever you roll a 4, you may tap or untap target artifact or creature.
Whenever you roll a 6, return target creature card from your graveyard to your hand.

Monitor Monitor

When Monitor Monitor enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)
Once each turn, you may pay {1} to reroll one or more dice you rolled.

Riders of Rohan

When Riders of Rohan enters, create two 2/2 red Human Knight creature tokens with trample and haste.
Dash {4}{R}{W} (You may cast this spell for its dash cost. If you do, it gains haste, and it's returned from the battlefield to its owner's hand at the beginning of the next end step.)

Soul Swindler

As long as you've visited an Attraction this turn, Soul Swindler has indestructible. (Damage and effects that say "destroy" don't destroy it.)
When Soul Swindler enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Icing Manipulator

Each +1/+1 counter on a creature you control is also a Food token. (It's an artifact with "{2}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.")
{3}{G}, {T}: Roll two six-sided dice. For each odd result, put a +1/+1 counter on a creature of your choice. Activate only as a sorcery.

Haberthrasher

Deathtouch
Whenever another creature you control that has a hat enters or a hat sticker is put on a creature you control, each opponent loses 1 life.

Scooch

Add or subtract 1 from target creature's power, target player's life total, or target die roll's result.
Draw a card.

Park Re-Entry

Return up to two target creature cards that each have a hat and/or mana value 3 or less from your graveyard to the battlefield.

Discourtesy Clerk

When Discourtesy Clerk enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)
At the beginning of your end step, if you control three or more Attractions, you draw a card and you lose 1 life.

Centaur of Attention

When Centaur of Attention enters, roll five six-sided dice and store those results on it.
At the beginning of combat on your turn, you may reroll any number of Centaur of Attention's stored results.
Centaur of Attention gets +X/+X, where X is the greatest number of stored results on it of the same value.

Lembas

When Lembas enters, scry 1, then draw a card.
{2}, {T}, Sacrifice Lembas: You gain 3 life.
When Lembas is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, its owner shuffles it into their library.

The Superlatorium

Visit — An opponent chooses "the funniest," "the smelliest," or "the sturdiest." You choose a creature, then ask a person outside the game to choose the creature that best fits the chosen criteria. If they chose the same creature you chose, claim the prize!
Prize — Create two 1/1 red Balloon creature tokens with flying, then sacrifice The Superlatorium and open an Attraction.

Bamboozling Beeble

Protection from Robots
{1}, {T}: The next time target player would roll one or more dice this turn, instead they roll that many dice plus one and you choose one of those rolls to ignore.

Assembled Ensemble

Vigilance
Assembled Ensemble's power is equal to the number of Robots you control.
Whenever you cast a spell with an artifact creature in its art, create a 1/1 white Clown Robot artifact creature token.

Have

Chaos Wrap

The owner of target permanent shuffles it into their library. Then they may look at the top card of their library and may wrap it. If it's a permanent card, they may put it onto the battlefield. Otherwise, they may put it onto the battlefield face down as a 4/4 red Present creature. (To wrap a card, put it inside lots of sleeves. If it would be dealt damage or destroyed, remove a sleeve from it instead.)

Second Breakfast

Up to two target creatures each get +2/+1 until end of turn. Create a Food token. (It's an artifact with "{2}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.")

Jermane, Pride of the Circus

{G}, {T}: Put two +1/+1 counters on target creature with four or more legs.
{1}{G}{G}, {T}: Until end of turn, all creatures able to block target creature with four or more legs do so.

Centrifuge

Visit — Each player draws a card from the library of the player to their right. You create three Treasure tokens.

Mirkwood Elk

Trample
Whenever Mirkwood Elk enters or attacks, return target Elf card from your graveyard to your hand. You gain life equal to that card's power.

Petting Zookeeper

Reach
When Petting Zookeeper enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Squirrel Stack

Visit — You have five seconds to stack dice on top of one another. If you stack at least five dice, claim the prize!
Prize — Create a 1/1 green Squirrel creature token for each die you stacked above the fourth, then sacrifice Squirrel Stack and open an Attraction.

Treacherous Trapezist

Flying
Whenever you cast an alliterative spell, scry 2. (Anything with two or more capitalized words in its name that begin with the same letter is alliterative.)
Other alliterative creatures you control have flying.

Trapeze Artist

Flying
Trapeze Artist enters by being flipped from a height of at least one foot (about 0.3 meters). If it lands face down or didn't turn over completely at least once during the flip, return it to its owner's hand.

Guess Your Fate

Visit — Look at the bottom card of your library, then give a person outside the game a one-word clue not on that card. They guess a word. If their guess appears in that card's name, claim the prize!
Prize — Reveal the card, put it into your hand, then sacrifice Guess Your Fate and open an Attraction.

Devil K. Nevil

Haste
When Devil K. Nevil enters, jump it over any number of creatures. If it clears those creatures, put that many +1/+1 counters on it. (You can see a jumping demonstration at DevilKNevil.com.)

Celebr-8000

At the beginning of combat on your turn, roll two six-sided dice. For each result of 1, Celebr-8000 gets +1/+1 until end of turn. For each other result, it gains the indicated ability until end of turn. If you rolled doubles, it also gains double strike until end of turn.
• 2 — menace
• 3 — vigilance
• 4 — lifelink
• 5 — flying
• 6 — indestructible

Xenosquirrels

Xenosquirrels enters with two +1/+1 counters on it.
After you roll a die, you may remove a +1/+1 counter from Xenosquirrels. If you do, increase or decrease the result by 1.

Clowning Around

Create two 1/1 white Clown Robot artifact creature tokens, then roll a six-sided die. If the result is equal to or less than the number of Robots you control, create a 1/1 white Clown Robot artifact creature token.

Autograph Book

Autograph Book enters with a page counter on it for each person who has signed it.
{3}, {T}, Remove a page counter from Autograph Book: Draw a card.

D00-DL, Caricaturist

When D00-DL, Caricaturist enters, create a 4/4 colorless Sketch creature token, which you have fifteen seconds to draw. The token has flying if it has wings in its art. The same is true for first strike and a sword, vigilance and a shield, menace and mean eyes, trample and horns, deathtouch and claws, lifelink and fangs, and haste and footwear.

An Incident Has Occurred

Choose one or both —
• Destroy target creature with flying.
• Destroy target Attraction. (It's put into its owner's junkyard.)
You may apologize. If you do, you gain 3 life.

Busted!

Counter target spell unless its controller pays {X}, where X is the number of words in the name with the most words among permanents you control.

Farmer Cotton

When Farmer Cotton enters, create X 1/1 white Halfling creature tokens and X Food tokens. (They're artifacts with "{2}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.")

Rat in the Hat

{T}, Sacrifice Rat in the Hat: Until end of turn, you may cast target creature card that has a hat from your graveyard.

Step Right Up

Open two Attractions. (Put the top two cards of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Log Flume

Visit — Choose up to four creatures you control. Those creatures jump in a log until end of turn. (Creatures in a log together can't be blocked unless they're all blocked. If a spell or ability you control targets one of them, it targets all of them.)

Ent's Fury

Put a +1/+1 counter on target creature you control if its power is 4 or greater. Then that creature gets +1/+1 until end of turn and fights target creature you don't control.

Impounding Lot-Bot

When Impounding Lot-Bot enters, you may say "INCARCERATE!" in a robot voice. If you do, exile another target artifact or enchantment until Impounding Lot-Bot leaves the battlefield.

T.A.P.P.E.R.

{T}, Tap an untapped creature you control that has a hat: Tap target creature.

Gallery of Legends

Visit — Exile cards from the top of your library until you exile a nonland card, then choose a legendary creature card name with the same mana value as that card. Create a token that's a copy of the card with the chosen name. That token gains haste. Exile it at the beginning of the next end step.

Dart Throw

Visit — Throw a card you own from outside the game onto the playing area from a distance of three feet (about one meter). If that card touches Dart Throw, claim the prize!
Prize — Create two 2/2 pink Teddy Bear creature tokens. Sacrifice Dart Throw, then open an Attraction.

Mistakes Were Made

Destroy target artifact or enchantment. Create a 1/1 green Squirrel creature token for each fire extinguisher you can see from your seat.

Revive the Shire

Return target permanent card from your graveyard to your hand. Create a Food token. (It's an artifact with "{2}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.")

Disemvowel

Destroy target creature. That creature's controller loses 1 life for each unique vowel in the creature's name. (The vowels are A, E, I, O, U, and Y.)

Théoden, King of Rohan

Whenever Théoden, King of Rohan or another Human you control enters, target creature gains double strike until end of turn.

Attempted Murder

Choose target creature. Roll X six-sided dice. For each even result, put two -1/-1 counters on that creature. For each odd result, create a 1/2 blue Bird creature token with flying named Storm Crow.

Cirith Ungol Patrol

{1}, {T}, Sacrifice another creature: Draw a card, then create a Food token. (It's an artifact with "{2}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.")

Jetpack Janitor

Alpha strike (This creature has first strike as long as it's blocking or being blocked by a creature that comes after it alphabetically.)

Coming Attraction

Search your library for a basic land card, put it onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle. Open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Squirrel Squatters

When Squirrel Squatters enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)
Whenever Squirrel Squatters attacks, create a 1/1 green Squirrel creature token that's tapped and attacking for each Attraction you've visited this turn.

Blufferfish

{3}{U}: An opponent tells you a statement about themselves and secretly notes whether it's true or false. You guess which it is. If you guessed correctly, Blufferfish gets +2/+0 and can't be blocked this turn.

Slight Malfunction

Choose one —
• Destroy target artifact.
• Roll a six-sided die. When you do, Slight Malfunction deals 1 damage to each of up to X target creatures, where X is the result.

Hardy of Myra's Marvels

As Hardy of Myra's Marvels enters, choose a number.
Whenever you cast a spell with the chosen number of lines of flavor text, put that many +1/+1 counters on target creature.
Partner (You can have two commanders if both have partner.)

Greatest Show in the Multiverse

(As this Saga enters and after your draw step, add a lore counter. Sacrifice after III.)
As an additional cost to cast this spell, exile five instant and/or sorcery cards you own with the same artist and different names from outside the game.
I, II, III — Choose one of the exiled cards at random. You may cast it without paying its mana cost.

The Space Family Goblinson

The Space Family Goblinson has trample as long as you've rolled three or more dice this turn.
Whenever you roll a die, put a +1/+1 counter on The Space Family Goblinson.

Quick Fixer

Menace
Whenever Quick Fixer deals combat damage to a player, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Circuits Act

Roll three six-sided dice. For each different result, create a 1/1 white Clown Robot artifact creature token.

Goblin Blastronauts

When Goblin Blastronauts enters, open an Attraction.
Whenever you roll a 6, you may copy the spell, ability, or Attraction visit that caused you to roll that die. You may choose new targets for the copy.