Mystic Doom Sandwich

{TK}{TK} — Lifelink
{TK}{TK}{TK} — This creature must be blocked if able. Whenever this creature becomes blocked, it gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each creature blocking it.
{TK}{TK} — 1/4
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/8

Elemental Time Flamingo

{TK}{TK} — Exile this permanent: You may cast target nonland card from your graveyard this turn.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever a creature you control dies, each opponent loses 1 life and you gain 1 life.
{TK}{TK} — 1/5
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 5/4

Deep-Fried Plague Myr

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, scry 1.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever this permanent leaves the battlefield, you may destroy target artifact or enchantment.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 4/5
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 8/4

Contortionist Otter Storm

{TK}{TK} — {T}: Target creature gains haste until end of turn.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Deathtouch, lifelink
{TK}{TK} — 5/1
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 3/5

Giant Mana Cake

{TK}{TK} — When this permanent leaves the battlefield, create two Food tokens. (They're artifacts with "{2}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.")
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — When this permanent dies, destroy target nonland permanent.
{TK}{TK} — 3/3
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/2

Eldrazi Guacamole Tightrope

{TK}{TK} — Haste
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — You may cast this card from your graveyard by paying 2 life in addition to paying its other costs.
{TK}{TK} — 1/4
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 5/3

Phyrexian Midway Bamboozle

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, you get {TK}.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Undying (When this creature dies, if it had no +1/+1 counters on it, return it to the battlefield under its owner's control with a +1/+1 counter on it.)
{TK}{TK} — 4/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/9

Demonic Tourist Laser

{TK}{TK} — Outlast {1} ({1}, {T}: Put a +1/+1 counter on this creature. Outlast only as a sorcery.)
{TK}{TK}{TK} — When this permanent dies, you get seven {TK}.
{TK}{TK} — 1/4
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 9/6

Misunderstood Trapeze Elf

{TK}{TK} — Whenever you cast a spell, this creature gets +X/+X until end of turn, where X is the amount of generic mana in that spell's mana cost.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Hexproof
{TK}{TK} — 4/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/6

Carnival Elephant Meteor

{TK}{TK} — Sacrifice this permanent: Draw two cards.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, proliferate. (Choose any number of permanents and/or players, then give each another counter of each kind already there.)
{TK}{TK} — 4/1
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 8/7

Sassy Gremlin Blood

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, create a Treasure token.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — {3}: Target creature gains flying until end of turn.
{TK}{TK} — 3/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 10/10

Cursed Firebreathing Yogurt

{TK}{TK} — Prowess, prowess (Whenever you cast a noncreature spell, this creature gets +1/+1 until end of turn twice.)
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — {2}, {T}: This permanent deals 2 damage to any target.
{TK}{TK} — 4/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 4/8

Night Brushwagg Ringmaster

{TK}{TK} — Menace
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Persist (When this permanent dies, if it had no -1/-1 counters on it, return it to the battlefield under its owner's control with a -1/-1 counter on it.)
{TK}{TK} — 2/3
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 10/10

Happy Dead Squirrel

{TK}{TK} — {T}: Add {C}{C}. Spend this mana only to cast noncreature spells.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Infect (This permanent deals damage to creatures in the form of -1/-1 counters and to players in the form of poison counters.)
{TK}{TK} — 3/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 4/7

Geek Lotus Warrior

{TK}{TK} — {2}: This creature gets +2/+0 until end of turn.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever a creature enters under your control, this permanent deals 2 damage to target player.
{TK}{TK} — 4/1
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 3/6

Familiar Beeble Mascot

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, untap target permanent.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever a creature enters under your control, creatures you control get +1/+1 until end of turn.
{TK}{TK} — 2/3
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 5/3

Playable Delusionary Hydra

{TK}{TK} — {T}: Draw a card, then discard a card.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, you gain 3 life and draw a card.
{TK}{TK} — 1/5
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 4/4

Ancestral Hot Dog Minotaur

{TK}{TK} — Afflict 2 (Whenever this creature becomes blocked, defending player loses 2 life.)
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Flying
{TK}{TK} — 1/4
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 8/6

Jetpack Death Seltzer

{TK}{TK} — Trample
{TK}{TK}{TK} — {3}: Monstrosity 3. (If this creature isn't monstrous, put three +1/+1 counters on it and it becomes monstrous.)
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 2/7
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 6/5

Primal Elder Kitty

{TK}{TK} — {1}: This creature gets +1/-1 until end of turn.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — When this creature dies, you may put X +1/+1 counters on target creature, where X is this creature's power.
{TK}{TK} — 5/1
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 4/7

Eternal Acrobat Toast

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, exile target creature you control, then return it to the battlefield under its owner's control.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — {T}: Untap another target permanent.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — 4/4
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 7/8

Notorious Sliver War

{TK}{TK} — {5}: Creatures you control get +1/+1 until end of turn.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Protection from creatures with two or more creature types
{TK}{TK} — 3/3
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 9/6

Goblin Coward Parade

{TK}{TK} — Mentor (Whenever this creature attacks, put a +1/+1 counter on target attacking creature with lesser power.)
{TK}{TK}{TK} — When this permanent leaves the battlefield, you may destroy target creature with power 4 or greater.
{TK}{TK} — 2/3
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 8/4

Cool Fluffy Loxodon

{TK}{TK} — When this permanent leaves the battlefield, draw a card.
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — Whenever a creature enters under your control, this permanent becomes a 13/13 Eldrazi creature in addition to its other types until end of turn.
{TK}{TK} — 4/2
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 5/6

Narrow-Minded Baloney Fireworks

{TK}{TK} — Whenever this creature attacks, you gain 2 life.
{TK}{TK}{TK} — Vigilance, reach
{TK}{TK} — 2/4
{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK}{TK} — 7/7