{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Target player gets you target drink. You pay any costs for the drink.

{4}, {T}: Tear this artifact into pieces. Throw the pieces onto the battlefield from a distance of at least five feet. Destroy each permanent that a piece touches. Remove the pieces from the game.

You choose all targets for all spells and abilities.

This artifact enters tapped. {7}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Choose target player. At the beginning of the next end step, exchange life totals with that player, exchange control of all permanents you and that player control, and exchange cards in your hands, cards in your libraries, and cards in your graveyards.

When The Grand Calcutron enters, each player's hand becomes a program (an ordered row of revealed cards). Players can play only the first card of their program. If a card would be put into a player's hand from anywhere, that player reveals it and places it anywhere within their program instead. At the beginning of each player's end step, if that player's program has fewer than five cards, they draw cards equal to the difference. The Grand Calcutron can be your commander.

This land enters tapped. {T}: Add one and one-half mana of any one color.

({T}: Add {W} or {U}.) As this land enters, you may pay 2 life. If you don't, it enters tapped.

({T}: Add {U}.)

({T}: Add {R}.)

({T}: Add {W}.)

({T}: Add {R} or {W}.) As this land enters, you may pay 2 life. If you don't, it enters tapped.

({T}: Add {U} or {R}.) As this land enters, you may pay 2 life. If you don't, it enters tapped.

Squirrellink (Damage dealt by this creature also causes you to create that many 1/1 green Squirrel creature tokens.) Creature tokens you control are Squirrels in addition to their other creature types. Other Squirrels you control get +1/+1.

Whenever you cast a wordy spell, scry 2. (A spell is wordy if it has four or more lines of rules text.) {1}{R}, {T}: Choose target creature you don't control. Reveal the top card of your library. Alexander Clamilton gets +X/+0 until end of turn, where X is the number of lines of rules text of the revealed card. Alexander Clamilton fights that creature.

Trample Whenever a player casts a spell, put a chip counter on its mana value. This creature gets +9/+9 for each set of three numbers in a row with chip counters on them.

Baron Von Count enters with a doom counter on "5." Whenever you cast a spell with the indicated numeral in its mana cost, text box, power, or toughness, move the doom counter one numeral to the left. When the doom counter moves from "1," destroy target player and put that doom counter on "5."

As this creature enters and whenever it attacks, stack two dice on top of it. (All dice must be stacked vertically, one on top of another.) This creature gets +1/+1 for each die in its stack. This creature attacks each combat if able. When the stack falls, sacrifice this creature.

Spells you cast cost {½} less to cast.

Whenever a 6 is rolled on a six-sided die, put a +1/+1 counter on each Bird. (You may roll dice only when instructed to.) Tap an untapped Bird you control: Roll a six-sided die. (Like now.)

At the beginning of your upkeep, you may ask target player a yes-or-no question. If you do, that player answers the question truthfully and abides by that answer if able until end of turn.

Combined, enchanted, and equipped creatures you control have menace. {3}{B}{R}, {T}: Put two target creature cards from graveyards onto the battlefield combined into one creature under your control. (Its power is equal to their total power, its toughness is equal to their total toughness, and it has their names, mana costs, types, text boxes, etc.)

Flying, first strike, trample Once each turn, while you're searching your library, you may pay {1}{B}, reveal this card from your library and say "I'm coming, too" If you do, this card deals 2 damage to a player of your choice.

(This creature has INFINITE POWER.)

First strike {1}{W}, Do the Hokey Pokey: Prevent all damage a source of your choice would deal to this creature this turn. (To do the Hokey Pokey, choose an arm, a leg, or your whole self and put it in. Put it out. Put it in. Shake it all about. You do the Hokey Pokey! Turn yourself around.)

{2}{G}, {T}: Roll a six-sided die. It becomes a green Die creature token with power and toughness each equal to its result. {2}{U}, {T}: Reroll any die. (Activate only any time it makes sense.)

You may play cards as though they were other cards of your choice with the same mana cost. You can't choose the same card twice. (Mana cost includes color.)

State-based actions don't apply to you or other permanents you control. (You don't lose the game due to having 0 or less life or drawing from an empty library. Your creatures aren't destroyed due to damage or deathtouch and aren't put into a graveyard due to having 0 or less toughness. Your planeswalkers aren't put into a graveyard if they have 0 loyalty. You don't put a legendary permanent into a graveyard if you control two with the same name. Counters aren't removed from your permanents due to game rules. Permanents you control attached or combined illegally remain on the battlefield. For complete rules and regulations, see rule 704.)

{2}{U}, {T}: Look at the top card of target player's library. If it has an Agents of S.N.E.A.K. watermark, you may reveal it and put it into your hand. Otherwise, put it on your choice of the top or bottom of its owner's library.

{T}: Roll a six-sided die. This ability has the indicated effect. 1 — Sacrifice this artifact and you lose 5 life. 2 — Add {W}. 3 — Add {U}. 4 — Add {B}. 5 — Add {R}. 6 — Add {G}.

As this enchantment enters, create a 1/1 green Squirrel creature token. You lose the game when that creature leaves the battlefield. Creatures can't attack you. You have shroud. You can't cast spells.

As Ineffable Blessing enters, choose a number. Whenever a creature you control with exactly the chosen number of words in its name enters, draw a card. (Hyphenated words are one word.)

Increase the result of each die you roll by 2.

Whenever you cast a spell with a squirrel in its art, you get {A} (an acorn counter). Whenever a Squirrel you control enters or dies, you get {A}. {2}{B}, Pay X {A}: Target creature gets -X/-X until end of turn. {G}, Pay X {A}: Target creature gets +X/+X until end of turn.

Players play a Magic subgame under the table, starting at 5 life and using their libraries as their decks. The winner searches their library for two cards, puts those cards into their hand, then shuffles.

Open a sealed Magic booster pack, reveal the cards, and put all creature cards revealed this way onto the battlefield under your control. They're Zombies in addition to their other types. (Remove those cards from your deck before beginning a new game.)

Players play a Magic subgame, starting at 1 life and using their libraries as their decks. For the rest of the main game, if a source would deal damage to a player who didn't win the subgame, it deals double that damage to that player instead.